Navigating in our 20s | Deepak Pareek | TEDxNKC

Introduction and Podcast Overview

• Deepak Pareek, a full-time content creator, introduces himself and his podcast, The Chill Hour, where he has conversations with guests about their deepest and darkest secrets (30s).
• He is speaking about navigating one's 20s and asks the audience how many of them are in their 20s, with most of the audience responding affirmatively (1m1s).
• Deepak asks the audience about their decision-making skills, with options ranging from good to the absolute worst, and shares that he will be discussing certain decisions that can make life difficult or easy (1m38s).
• At 28 years old, Deepak speaks from his experience and will share three points that he hopes will inspire and motivate the audience (1m54s).

Leaving Home and Gaining Independence

• The first point he discusses is leaving home, which he believes will happen to everyone at some point, regardless of their control over it (2m40s).
• People may leave home for work, studies, or to meet certain people, and some may be forced to leave due to a bad environment or a desire for independence (3m26s).
• Deepak shares his personal experience of leaving home at 24 years old to pursue a master's degree in the UK, which was a tough time for him (5m18s).
• He notes that people who are not from Mumbai may relate to his experience of stepping out of their comfort zone and learning to adapt to a new environment (4m28s).
• Learning to live an independently is crucial, and it involves mastering basic chores of daily life, such as ensuring the gates are closed before sleep, which is often taken care of by family members when living at home (5m40s).
• When moving away from home for the first time, one realizes the benefits they had while living with their family, and it's essential to learn how to adapt to new situations (6m14s).
• Not everyone is an early riser, and it's common for people in their 20s to have different schedules, especially during weekends (6m24s).
• Moving away from home can be challenging, and it's essential to learn new skills, such as opening a bank account, which may not be as easy as it seems (7m28s).
• Cooking is another essential skill to learn when living away from home, and it can be a challenging experience, especially when sharing a flat with others (7m42s).
• Leaving home is inevitable, and it's essential to be prepared for the experience, which can be life-changing (9m43s).
• It's recommended to leave home for at least one or two years to learn how things are done and gain independence, after which one can return home and live with their family (9m52s).

Navigating Friendships and Relationships

• Navigating friendships and relationships is crucial in one's 20s, and it's essential to understand that not all friendships last a lifetime (10m15s).
• Many people lose touch with friends from school or college, and it's a natural part of life, with people's priorities and circumstances changing over time (11m51s).
• It's essential to be prepared for the possibility of losing connections and friendships, and it's not uncommon for people to drift apart (11m53s).
• Mediums and modes of communication may change, but the possibility of losing touch with friends will always exist (12m15s).
• It's okay if certain friends only reach out for work, and there's nothing wrong with that, as not everyone can have the same level of bonding with every person they meet in life (13m29s).
• Communicating and setting expectations from friends is very important, whether it's in friendships or relationships, to avoid misunderstandings and clarify what one can or cannot do (14m41s).

Communicating with Parents

• Conversations with parents can be difficult, especially in one's 20s, and it's essential to be honest and open with them about one's feelings and thoughts (15m14s).
• A typical Indian dad is often described as someone who sleeps, reads, and watches news or sports on TV, usually wearing shorts and having a cup of chai or coffee nearby (16m5s).
• In modern households, it's often challenging to have open conversations with parents, and it's essential to sit with them, talk to them, and bring them up to pace with one's generation (18m6s).
• Although it may be difficult, it's crucial to have open conversations with parents, as it can bridge the generation gap, open up new doors, and help one learn new things (18m53s).

The Story of a Family Friend's Illness and Passing

• A family friend of the narrator's dad was diagnosed with cancer, and despite visiting the best doctors, there was no hope for recovery (19m12s).
• A distant relative from Rajasthan suggested visiting a "Baba" who was known to have cured cancer in many patients, and the family friend's group decided to take a chance (20m20s).
• The family friend's group booked a flight to visit the "Baba", who prescribed a "JY Booty", which showed little improvement in the patient's condition (20m41s).
• One night during the COVID-19 pandemic, the patient's son called the narrator's dad at 1:30 a.m., and the narrator drove his dad to the hospital in heavy rain and low visibility (21m9s).
• The hospital was 15 minutes away, but it took 45 minutes to reach due to the heavy rain, and when they arrived, they heard the news that the patient had passed away (21m56s).
• The patient's friends and family gathered at the hospital, and the narrator's dad and the patient's son were emotional, with the narrator's dad crying and the patient's son trying to stay strong (22m40s).
• The narrator's dad and the patient's wife were crying, but the patient's son was not, as he was trying to come to terms with the news (23m47s).
• The narrator drove his dad back home after hearing the news, and it was the first time he saw his dad cry normally, without using his phone or trying to hide his emotions (24m24s).
• The narrator's parents were both crying, and he was trying to make sense of the situation, realizing that as people age, they tend to spend more time thinking about their own mortality (25m2s).