Dr. Allan Schore: How Relationships Shape Your Brain

Dr. Allan Schore (0s)

• Dr. Allan Schore is a clinician, psychoanalyst, and world expert in how childhood attachment patterns impact adult relationships, including romantic relationships, friendships, professional relationships, and one's relationship to themselves (14s).
• Dr. Schore is on the faculty in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the University of California, Los Angeles School of Medicine and has authored several important books, including "Right Brain Psychotherapy" and "Development of the Unconscious Mind" (38s).
• The first 24 months of age are crucial for brain development, which is influenced by interactions with primary caretakers, such as the mother or father (59s).
• During this period, the right brain and left brain mediate specific but different processes, with the right brain circuitry involved in developing resonance with the primary caretaker (1m14s).
• This resonance involves transitioning between states of calm and excitement, which is critical to emotional development and the formation of attachments (1m35s).
• Attachment styles, such as avoidant, anxious, or secure attachment, develop based on early life experiences and can be understood through the lens of childhood attachment patterns (1m54s).
• These childhood attachment patterns can be modified through specific protocols to achieve better relationships with others and oneself (2m12s).
• Understanding childhood attachment patterns is essential for personal growth and improving relationships, and Dr. Schore's work provides valuable insights into this area (2m26s).

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Thoughts & Unconscious Mind (5m49s)

• The question of what percentage of our thinking and behavior is governed by our conscious mind versus our unconscious mind is a central topic of discussion (5m51s).
• The unconscious mind has been a significant part of the discussion, especially considering the speaker's background in psychoanalysis and psychodynamic psychotherapy, as well as neuroscience (6m5s).
• The right brain is suggested to be the unconscious mind, constantly processing information, especially emotional information, at levels beneath conscious awareness (6m22s).
• This processing of information by the right brain occurs especially when an individual is in an emotional interaction (6m40s).
• It is estimated that 90-95% of our basic motivations for our actions are unconscious, with data supporting this claim (6m53s).
• The unconscious mind operates beneath the surface at all times, influencing our decisions, contrary to the previous belief that it only emerges in dreams (7m7s).
• The right brain plays a crucial role in reading unconscious communications between individuals, such as assessing safety and understanding in interactions (7m19s).
• These unconscious communications are critical and more important than previously thought, operating constantly beneath the surface (7m29s).

Right vs Left Brain, Child Development, Attachment (7m36s)

• The human brain growth spurt occurs from the last trimester of pregnancy through the second to third year of life, during which the right hemisphere of the brain is dominant (8m23s).
• Six major studies in neuroscience laboratories have shown that the right hemisphere is dominant during this period, with the left hemisphere not experiencing a growth spurt until the end of the second year and into the third year (8m35s).
• The right hemisphere's dominance is not limited to cortical areas but also includes subcortical areas, such as the amygdala, which has different functions in the right and left hemispheres (9m10s).
• Attachment is primarily about right-brain dynamics, occurring during the brain growth spurt in the first two years of life, and is shaped by the mother's regulation of the baby's brain through the attachment mechanism (9m37s).
• The mother shapes the baby's right brain through face, voice, and gesture, reading the baby's expressions, and resonating with and regulating the baby's communications (11m55s).
• The attachment relationship in the first two years of life, which is a right-brain to right-brain connection, influences strategies of affect regulation for the rest of one's life (12m34s).
• The development of insecure attachments is also shaped by the right hemisphere, and the attachment relationship can be either secure or insecure, with the mother's influence being "for better or for worse" (10m17s).
• Throughout the lifespan, the brain experiences growth spurts, including one in adolescence, which is initially marked by a right-brain growth spurt, followed by a left-brain growth spurt (10m52s).
• Attachment is about the communication and regulation of emotions, with the mother and infant communicating right-brain to right-brain in the first two years of life (11m22s).
• The key to understanding attachment lies in the regulation of emotions, which was not fully explored in early attachment studies that focused on behaviors and cognition (12m48s).

Attachment Styles & Development, Emotions & Physiology (13m19s)

• A study on attachment styles involves a mother and child being separated in a pseudo daycare setting, and the child's reaction to the mother's return is observed to classify their attachment behavior as secure, insecure, or a combination of different behaviors (13m27s).
• The classification of attachment behaviors has led to the understanding of adult relationship styles, including secure, insecure, anxious, and avoidant styles (14m8s).
• Research suggests that right brain and left brain dominance changes throughout a person's lifespan, but it is more closely tied to developmental milestones than chronological age (14m24s).
• The attachment relationship is a hierarchy that starts subcortically and moves to cortical, with changes occurring at different stages of life, as described by Eric Erikson (14m51s).
• The attachment relationship guides a person's relationships with others and their strategies for dealing with stress, which is influenced by how the mother regulates the baby's stress during a critical period (15m9s).
• The critical period for the right brain is the first two years of life, during which strategies for affect regulation, dealing with stress, and handling novel situations are developed (15m36s).
• Attachment models have moved from focusing on behavior to cognition to emotion, with the understanding that attachment is a psychobiological process (16m3s).
• Emotions are associated with both psychological and physiological events, including the physiology of the stress response and the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems (16m42s).
• A mother who is securely attached is a good affect regulator of her baby, recognizing and synchronizing with the baby's emotions and regulating their negative states (17m33s).
• The mother's regulation of the baby's emotions is an implicit process, using her right brain and intuition to respond to the baby's needs (17m58s).

Intuition, Arousal, Emotional Regulation & Attachment (18m12s)

• Intuition involves implicit processes that occur beneath levels of awareness, allowing a person to know what to do without conscious thought, such as a mother intuitively knowing how to regulate her baby's emotional states (18m27s).
• The mother uses her tone of voice and facial expressions to regulate the baby's emotional arousal, either upregulating or downregulating the baby's state depending on the situation (18m33s).
• Attachment is the regulator of emotional arousal, which includes the autonomic nervous system, and involves the regulation of the limbic system, emotion processing, and the autonomic nervous system (18m59s).
• The right brain has a control system for attachment and is responsible for regulating emotional states, particularly in the early years of life before the left hemisphere develops (19m32s).
• The right hemisphere processes implicit stimuli, while the left hemisphere processes explicit, conscious, and rational stimuli (19m55s).
• Attachment theory is essentially a regulation theory, where attachment is interactive regulation, and the mother regulates the baby's emotional states implicitly, beneath levels of awareness (20m17s).
• There are two forms of regulation: autoregulation, where the individual regulates their own emotional states, and interactive regulation, where the individual regulates their emotional states with the help of another person (21m28s).
• Autoregulation involves the regulation of the amygdala by the right orbital frontal cortex, which is the highest level of the right hemisphere and is responsible for regulating emotional states (21m44s).
• In a secure attachment, the individual learns how to autoregulate their emotions when apart from others and how to interactively regulate their emotions with others, particularly in times of stress or when sharing joy states (22m16s).

Psychobiological Attunement, Repair; Insecure & Anxious Attachment (23m13s)

• In avoidant attachment, a toddler around 2-3 years old tends to auto-regulate more often than seeking help from others for coordinated regulation (23m15s).
• The key to attachment is psychobiological attunement, where the mother regulates both the psychological and physiological aspects of the child, including the autonomic nervous system (23m40s).
• Insecure attachment can result from misattunement, where the mother misreads the baby's states, but a good enough caregiver can repair this misattunement by resynchronizing and reconnecting with the baby (24m17s).
• The repair of misattunement is crucial for a secure attachment, allowing the baby to understand and use the experience to develop a secure attachment (24m47s).
• Avoidant personalities, also known as dismissive personalities, are uncomfortable with real closeness and tend to auto-regulate, dismissing the need for interactive regulation (25m17s).
• Insecure anxious attachment is characterized by a person who is always interactively regulating and seeking help from others, but struggles with auto-regulation (25m36s).
• If a child and mother do not coordinate their autonomic regulation, it can lead to an insecure attachment, and this idea is crucial in understanding attachment styles (26m14s).
• An avoidant attached individual will learn to auto-regulate and seek help from others less often, whereas an anxious attached individual will have difficulty self-soothing but will seek help from others more frequently (26m43s).
• The same circuitry and mechanisms used to establish infant-mother attachment are repurposed later in life for adult relationships, highlighting the importance of early attachment experiences (27m35s).
• Attachment relationships are retained as autobiographical memories in the first two years of life, even before the development of the left hemisphere, and can influence positive and negative transferences later in life (28m10s).

Attachment Styles, Regulation Theory; Therapy (28m33s)

• There are four main attachment styles: secure, two types of organized insecure (avoiding and anxious), and disorganized-disoriented, also known as type D attachment (28m34s).
• Disorganized-disoriented attachment is associated with an inability to auto-regulate or interactively regulate under stress, often seen in conditions like PTSD and borderline personality disorder (28m56s).
• In anxious attachment, the attachment system is continually activated, leading to a constant activation of the right hemisphere, while in insecure dismissive attachment, the attachment system is deactivated, resulting in a deactivation of the right brain (29m34s).
• Secure attachment is efficient and can switch between different states, allowing for better communication with the left hemisphere when it comes online (29m56s).
• Regulation theory is a theory of the development of the self in optimal situations, as well as the psychopathogenesis of the self, including the early origins of psychiatric and personality disorders such as schizophrenia, depression, and narcissistic personality disorders (30m14s).
• The right hemisphere is dominant for the stress response, sympathetic nervous system, and parasympathetic nervous system, and plays a crucial role in attachment and regulation (30m58s).
• In therapy, the key is regulation, and the therapeutic relationship is essential, with a right brain to right brain interaction between the therapist and patient (31m44s).
• A good therapist knows how to bring back attachment dynamics, creating a sense of safety and trust, which is critical for therapy (32m26s).
• The ability to form a therapeutic relationship is the best indicator of success in therapy, and a good therapist can co-create this relationship with patients of different attachment styles, including avoidant, secure, anxious, and borderline patients (32m43s).
• In the first therapy session, the therapist listens to the patient's verbalizations to diagnose and understand symptomatology, while also listening beneath the words to track the attachment relationship and arousal disregulation (33m12s).
• To access the right lateralized attachment dynamics, the therapist must switch from the left brain to the right brain, a process known as surrender, which involves letting go and allowing oneself to be in the right brain state (34m0s).

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“Surrender,” Therapy, Patient Synchronization (35m51s)

• The concept of "surrender" in therapy involves the therapist listening to the patient's narrative while also paying attention to their underlying emotional state, such as feelings of anger, despair, or shock, and carrying this information in parallel tracks (35m52s).
• The therapist's goal is not only to soothe the patient but also to allow them to have a catharsis or release of their emotions, and to intervene at the right moment to coordinate and show the patient a different way to think and feel about the topic (36m26s).
• The therapist listens to the patient's left-brain communications (verbal narrative) while also listening to their right-brain communications (non-verbal cues, emotional state) (36m45s).
• The patient, especially one who is depressed, often communicates through right-brain communications, such as sadness in their voice and a disregulated face (36m57s).
• The therapist's first task is to synchronize with the patient's emotional arousal, whether it's hypoarousal (depression) or hyperarousal (anxiety), by matching their physiology with the patient's (37m18s).
• Through synchronization, the therapist can literally feel in their body what the patient is feeling, allowing them to understand the patient from the inside out (37m32s).
• The therapist may pick up on the patient's disregulation through their body, which may differ from the patient's verbal report (37m46s).
• The therapist synchronizes with the patient's emotional state, picking up on points where they shift into and out of an emotional state, and then implicitly regulates the patient's emotions through tone of voice, gestures, and facial expressions (38m13s).
• As the therapist and patient synchronize, they move from disregulation to regulation, allowing the therapist to show the patient what autoregulation or coordinated regulation is like (38m41s).
• The therapist's face, voice, and gestures convey this regulation, creating a therapeutic alliance with the patient (39m11s).
• The first session's key goal is to begin synchronizing with the patient and forming a therapeutic alliance, which may lead to the patient feeling better and sensing that the therapist understands them (39m20s).

Synchrony, Empathy, Therapy & Developing Autoregulation (39m46s)

• Adult romantic relationships can provide healing for failures of childhood attachment, and learning to "parent" oneself is often mentioned in popular psychology as a means of self-soothing, although this concept is not operationally defined (39m48s).
• The process of rewiring the capacity for autoregulation or coordinated regulation can start with a therapist, partly due to synchrony, which refers to the phenomenon of two people being synchronized in the same moment and feeling something spontaneously between themselves (40m29s).
• Interactive regulation, rather than autoregulation, is key, and it occurs on an implicit level, often without conscious awareness, with the right hemisphere playing a crucial role in this process (41m22s).
• The regulation of emotions, such as rage, loss, shame, and disgust, is implicit and requires the skill of being with patients over a long period, especially when they are in a disregulated state (41m52s).
• The difference between explicit and implicit regulation lies in the level of understanding, with explicit regulation being an intellectual understanding of symptoms and implicit regulation being an unconscious understanding at a physiological level (42m34s).
• Synchrony is the mechanism underlying empathy, which is a right-brain function, and there is a difference between emotional empathy, where one feels what another person is feeling, and cognitive empathy, which is an intellectual understanding that does not necessarily lead to changes (42m58s).
• Changes in the brain occur in the right hemisphere, specifically in the orbital frontal cortex, which forms new connections with the insula and amygdala, leading to more regulated states (44m4s).
• A strong therapeutic alliance, safety, and trust are essential for synchrony and interactive regulation to occur, and as synchrony increases, symptomatology will change due to the shift from disregulation to regulation (44m27s).

Mother vs Father, Child Development; Single Caretakers (45m7s)

• The formation of attachment circuits in a baby's brain is not gender-specific, and a female baby can form attachment patterns with her mother or female caretaker that can be reactivated in adult relationships with men, crossing gender lines (45m21s).
• Research suggests that there is a primary attachment figure for a baby, which is the person who interactively regulates the baby's stress between ages 0 and 2, and this can be either the mother or the father (46m43s).
• The primary attachment figure provides the right brain for the baby when it is under stress, and this role is not limited to the mother, as men can also have a well-developed right brain (47m1s).
• In most cultures, the mother's right brain is the primary attachment figure in the first year or two, but this can vary, and a stay-at-home dad with a well-developed right brain can also take on this role (47m35s).
• Around the end of the second year, the father becomes a primary attachment figure as well, but with some differences in his interaction with the baby, such as more arousing play and activation of the sympathetic autonomic system (48m0s).
• The father's role is more focused on teaching the child to take risks, promoting autonomy and independence, and helping the child tolerate more hyperarousal states, such as during rough-and-tumble play (48m31s).
• The mother's role is more focused on interactive regulation, providing a sense of safety and security for the baby, while the father's role is more focused on promoting exploration and independence (48m51s).
• A mother shapes a baby's right brain in the first year, while a father shapes the baby's left brain towards the end of the first year and into the third year (49m3s).
• The father's influence on the baby's left brain is not limited to the later stages of development, as he may have also had positive experiences with the baby early on in life (49m22s).
• A father who is tender yet instrumental and teaches the baby about the world is a good example of someone who can shape the baby's left brain (49m31s).
• In situations where there is only one primary caretaker, the person initially provides the right brain functions and then also provides the left brain functions (50m10s).
• This can be seen in single parents, such as a single woman with a child, who initially provides the right brain functions and then also provides the left brain functions in the second year (50m21s).
• In single-parent households, other family members or father figures may also step in to provide the left brain functions (50m27s).
• Both men and women have right and left brains, but the left brain skills are different and more autonomous (50m39s).

MDMA, Right Brain; Fetal Development (50m51s)

• Modern exploration of compounds like MDMA has shown potential in facilitating right brain synchrony between therapist and patient, with clinical studies indicating its possible usefulness in improving patient-therapist relationships and accelerating the therapeutic process, although it raises ethical concerns about both the patient and therapist taking the compound (50m51s).
• The relationship between the therapist and patient is key, and compounds like MDMA may be more efficacious if specifically involving right brain dynamics with a person who knows how to work with those right brain dynamics (51m41s).
• The right brain is often misunderstood as a simpler version of the left hemisphere, but it works completely differently and is the foundation of human behavior, with subcortical areas regulating attachment and being key to human development (52m20s).
• Research has shown that the right brain is in a growth spurt from the last trimester of fetal development to the first five years of life, and there is evidence of lateralization in the fetus and early memories being stored in the right amygdala (53m32s).
• The deeper parts of the right brain, including the insula and right amygdala, are evolving at birth, and there is synchronization across the placenta, regulating each other's autonomic nervous systems (54m5s).
• High levels of cortisol can cross the placental barrier and impact the development of the amygdala, leading to a continuous stress response and potentially affecting the evolution of the amygdala (54m41s).
• The development of the amygdala can be impacted by the mother's stress state during fetal development, and hormones and neuromodulators like dopamine and noradrenaline play a crucial role in regulating the development of the brain and forming neuroplastic circuits (55m21s).

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Integrating Positive & Negative Emotions, Quiet vs Excited Love (57m46s)

• A description of the coordination between a mother and child highlights the mother's role in regulating the baby's transition to up states, such as when the baby wakes up from a nap, by using sounds, humming, or bouncing lullabies to help the baby transition smoothly (58m0s).
• The mother's ability to regulate the baby's arousal is critical, and this process involves the release of neurotransmitters like serotonin, oxytocin, and dopamine (58m31s).
• The mother's regulation of the baby's transition to up states is also related to the release of norepinephrine and adrenaline at low, healthy levels (59m7s).
• The ability to oscillate between relaxation and excitement is the basis of all relationships, including adult friendships and relationships, which involves implicit emotional regulation (59m34s).
• Emotional regulation is key, and there has been too much emphasis on the downregulation of negative states, while the upregulation of positive states has been overlooked (59m39s).
• Attachment is not just about downregulating negative states, but also about upregulating positive states, and this is important in therapy as well (1h0m4s).
• Positive emotions, such as joy, enthusiasm, and excitement, are crucial in human experience, and they have neural aspects, such as the release of dopamine (1h0m20s).
• In therapy, it's not just about sharing and downregulating negative states, but also about sharing and upregulating positive states (1h0m31s).
• There are two types of love, quiet love and excited love, which were distinguished by psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott, and both are important and need to be integrated (1h0m50s).
• Quiet love involves the downregulation of noradrenaline and is associated with a parasympathetic state, while excited love is a higher arousal state and is also important (1h1m7s).
• Emotions, including negative ones like shame, serve adaptive purposes and are necessary for regulating high levels of arousal, with shame specifically helping to dose down very high levels of arousal (1h1m45s).
• A secure attachment is characterized by the ability to integrate both positive and negative emotions, allowing individuals to effectively manage their emotional states (1h2m7s).
• A securely attached mother can synchronize with her baby's emotional state, whether it's positive or negative, and help the baby regulate their emotions (1h2m17s).
• Insecure attachment styles, such as avoidant or anxious attachment, can contribute to the development of narcissistic personality disorders (1h2m34s).
• There are two types of narcissistic personality disorders: those with a vulnerable attachment, characterized by a need for constant praise, and those with an egotistical attachment (1h2m50s).
• Vulnerable attachment is a type of anxious attachment, where individuals constantly seek praise and validation (1h2m54s).
• Egotistical attachment is another type of narcissistic personality disorder, where individuals have an inflated sense of self-importance (1h3m3s).
• The ability to integrate positive and negative emotions is crucial for managing stress and adversity in life (1h3m9s).
• Failing to integrate positive and negative emotions can lead to emotional splitting, a psychological defense mechanism where individuals compartmentalize their emotions (1h3m25s).

Splitting, Boarderline; Therapy & Emotions (1h3m33s)

• Splitting is a primary feature of borderline personality disorder, characterized by the "I love you, I hate you" phenomenon, where a person's perception of someone or something suddenly switches from positive to negative, often triggered by a minor incident (1h3m42s).
• In borderline personality disorder, splitting can occur externally, where the person views someone as all bad and themselves as all good, or internally, where there is a split between a good self and a bad self, and these two parts cannot be integrated (1h4m24s).
• In therapy, individuals with borderline personality disorder often exhibit an over-idealization of the therapist, followed by a sudden shift to a negative perception of the therapist after a stressor or misattunement, which can lead to the person dropping out of therapy if not addressed (1h5m7s).
• Splitting is not unique to therapeutic relationships and can extend to other domains of life, such as work relationships and friendships, as it is a way of seeing the world that is deeply ingrained in the person's emotional relationships and right hemisphere of the brain (1h6m2s).
• In narcissistic personality disorder, the caregiver's positive perception of the infant can suddenly shift to a negative perception if the infant becomes depressed, leading to a disconnection and a lack of interactive regulation (1h6m25s).
• In dismissive attachment, a person may emotionally disengage and become abstract when they feel too close to someone, acting out their early attachment dynamics and expecting the other person to respond in a certain way (1h7m7s).
• In therapeutic relationships, individuals with anxious or avoidant attachment styles may exhibit a pattern of coming closer and moving apart, which can be acted out in the therapy session and requires the therapist to be aware of their own emotional tone and physiology (1h8m0s).
• Changes in personality require changes in the right brain, which involves implicit, emotional processes, and therapy should focus on emotion and the therapeutic relationship to bring about lasting changes (1h9m4s).
• All forms of therapy now recognize the importance of emotion and the therapeutic relationship in bringing about change, and therapy should focus on laying the groundwork for emotional regulation and change (1h9m13s).

Tool: Right Brain, Vulnerability & Repair (1h9m24s)

• The right brain can grow and repair itself, but it requires interpersonal connections and interactive regulation, rather than just self-regulation (1h9m25s).
• Finding people to be close, open, and vulnerable with is key to changing the right brain and forming a right brain-to-right brain communication system (1h10m28s).
• Interactive dynamics with others can create or elaborate on existing circuitry in the right brain, which may be atrophied in some individuals due to a lack of emotional nourishment early in life (1h10m59s).
• Engaging with others can activate right brain circuits, and when not around these people, the right brain circuitry can provide a soothing function, allowing individuals to feel secure in their ability to attach to others in healthy ways (1h11m22s).
• Having close friends or repairing relationships with family members can help elaborate on right brain circuitry, allowing individuals to feel confident in their ability to form healthy attachments (1h11m36s).
• The key to emotion and mental health is a right brain emotional situation, and therapy is about reworking emotion and forming a therapeutic alliance with the therapist (1h12m18s).
• In a therapy session, heightened affective moments can occur when the individual starts to open up and share their emotions, often around the middle of the session (1h13m9s).
• These heightened affective moments, which can last around 50-60 seconds, are crucial for emotional growth and development (1h13m41s).
• Sudden moments of synchronization in interpersonal relationships can lead to shared affective moments, allowing for potential change and growth in individuals, particularly in the right brain (1h13m49s).
• These shared affective moments are stored in autobiographical memory, which is closely tied to the right brain's use of images, enabling individuals to recall specific contexts and feelings of closeness (1h14m29s).
• The right brain plays a crucial role in storing these shared affective moments, making them more significant than intellectual knowledge in driving personal change (1h14m59s).
• Right brain-to-right brain communication is an ongoing process, but some individuals may struggle to read and interpret nonverbal cues, such as facial expressions and tone of voice, and have difficulty synchronizing with others (1h15m18s).

Right vs. Left Brain, Attention (1h15m32s)

• When making an effort to listen carefully to someone, there is a competition between the left and right brain, resulting in reduced right brain listening, which is related to the surrender aspect of listening (1h15m34s).
• The right brain can be engaged by widening one's gaze and trying to feel something coming in, rather than just focusing on the content of the words being spoken (1h16m8s).
• This shift from left to right brain can occur in about 100 milliseconds, and it is not possible to be in both hemispheres at the same time (1h16m41s).
• The right hemisphere is dominant for attention, and there are two types of attention: narrow attention, which is used by the left brain, and wide-ranging attention, which is used by the right brain (1h17m4s).
• Narrow attention is narrowly focused, such as following someone's words one after the other, while wide-ranging attention is more open and receptive, taking into account both external and internal stimuli (1h17m21s).
• Wide-ranging attention is also known as evenly suspended attention, a concept introduced by Freud, and it allows for a broader understanding of the context and emotional atmosphere of a situation (1h17m37s).
• People who are hyperlinear, hyperlogical, and hyper-rational, and live mostly in the left hemisphere, may have difficulty seeing the big picture and understanding the broader context of a situation (1h18m30s).
• The emotional atmosphere and context of a conversation can change when shifting from left to right brain, and this shift can affect the feeling of safety and trust between the individuals involved (1h19m17s).

Right Brain Synchronization, Eye Connection, Empathy (1h19m26s)

• The understanding of the brain has shifted from a one-person, intrapsychic psychology to a two-person, interpersonal psychology, focusing on the interactions between two individuals, such as a mother and baby or a patient and therapist (1h19m28s).
• Neuroimaging techniques, including hyperscanning, now allow for the simultaneous scanning of two people's brains during interpersonal interactions, revealing that the right brains of the two individuals synchronize, especially when they are in emotional states and looking at each other face-to-face (1h20m15s).
• The right temporal parietal junction is the part of the right brain that synchronizes with the other person's right brain, and it plays a crucial role in empathic communication (1h21m0s).
• Direct eye connection is a powerful form of communication, and the eyes are controlled by the autonomic nervous system, which synchronizes with the other person's autonomic nervous system during face-to-face interactions (1h21m24s).
• The face, voice, and gesture are processed in different parts of the right hemisphere, with the posterior parts processing the face, the sensory areas processing the voice, and the posterior parts also processing gesture and tactile information (1h22m0s).
• The integration of this information occurs in the right temporal parietal junction, which is responsible for sending and receiving communications during empathic synchronization (1h22m36s).
• In a therapeutic setting, the patient and therapist can literally be in the same emotional state, with the right temporal parietal junction playing a key role in this synchronization, allowing for a deeper understanding and communication (1h22m50s).
• This right brain to right brain communication is a key aspect of interpersonal relationships and is essential for building empathy and understanding between individuals (1h23m25s).
• Synchronization between two individuals can be observed when tracking each other's brain activity, specifically between the right temple parietal regions, indicating a right brain to right brain communication that is always occurring in this context (1h23m52s).
• This type of communication is a key aspect of the relational unconscious, which is a new understanding in psychoanalysis that the unconscious is not just active during dreams, but at all points, and communicates with another relational unconscious right brain to right brain (1h24m25s).
• The relational unconscious has changed the understanding of psychotherapy, shifting the focus from cognitive insight to the ability to have emotionally laden conversations and make emotional connections with another human being (1h24m50s).
• The therapeutic relationship is now considered the primary factor of change in psychotherapy, which is different from the traditional approach where the analyst would interpret the patient's unconscious thoughts from a distant perspective (1h25m1s).
• Modern psychoanalysis has also shifted from a non-face-to-face approach, where the patient would lie on a couch, to a face-to-face contact, which is supported by newer imaging tools that reveal synchrony between individuals (1h25m23s).

Music & Dogs, Resonance (1h25m39s)

• Music and dogs can evoke strong emotional responses and create a sense of resonance, with some people experiencing a feeling of fundamental truth when listening to certain types of music or interacting with dogs (1h25m39s).
• The emotional connection to music is highly individualized, with different genres and styles resonating with different people, and the lyrics may not always make logical sense but still convey a deeper meaning (1h26m15s).
• The connection to dogs is also deeply emotional, with domestic animals able to sense and respond to human emotions, creating a profound bond between humans and animals (1h27m8s).
• The right temporal-parietal junction and the right orbital frontal cortex are key brain regions involved in the communication and regulation of emotions, with the surrender switch being the colosal switch from the left to the right brain (1h27m55s).
• Music and dogs can both be mechanisms for affect regulation, with music activating the right brain and dogs providing tactile, auditory, and olfactory cues that can downregulate stress and promote emotional connection (1h28m27s).
• The sense of smell is also an important aspect of human relationships and attachment, with dogs being highly attuned to human scents and able to pick up on emotional cues through smell (1h29m32s).
• Playing music with others or experiencing live music can create a sense of synchrony and shared emotional experience, with studies showing that performers and audiences can enter synchronized states during a performance (1h30m27s).
• The connection to music and dogs can be a way to shift from the left brain to the right brain, promoting emotional regulation and downregulation of stress (1h30m3s).
• Bob Dylan's music is cited as an example of how the meaning and emotion behind lyrics can be conveyed through the sound and tone of the music, rather than just the logical content of the words (1h26m32s).

Right Brain & Body; Empathic Connection, Body Language (1h30m58s)

• The brain and body are connected in both directions, and the right brain has preferential communication with the parasympathetic and sympathetic aspects of the body, although it is likely a mixed connection (1h31m3s).
• Bodily sensing is a real phenomenon, where the diaphragm and core relax when a person is happy, and the right brain is more connected to the body than the left brain (1h31m28s).
• Ian McGilchrist's work suggests that the right brain is more dominant for unconscious will and is more connected to the body, which is important for emotional connections and empathy (1h32m17s).
• People can start to sense right brain-left brain shifts by paying less attention to the content of words and more to how a conversation is feeling, and by being aware of body posture and its impact on emotional states (1h32m44s).
• Manuel Hammer's work suggests that therapists can reach the affect of their patients by leaning back and letting the atmosphere come over them, rather than leaning forward, which can be seen as impending and not allowing the person space (1h33m27s).
• Leaning back can help create an emotional connection and allow the therapist to pick up on things they didn't see before, and can even lead to images coming to mind that represent the emotional experience of the other person (1h34m15s).
• Human relationships involve an "affective wireless" where individuals pick up on each other's emotions and images, creating a back-and-forth communication between the two, similar to right brain to right brain communication, as described by Hammer (1h34m49s).
• According to Freud, the human unconscious acts like a receptor, picking up communications from the unconscious of another human being without going through the conscious mind, allowing humans to sense the unconscious of others without realizing it (1h35m4s).
• Emotional communication involves spontaneous behaviors, which are not thought out and are more trustworthy, as they reveal a person's true feelings and intentions (1h35m34s).
• Spontaneous two-way communication, turn-taking, and synchrony are essential for building trust and understanding in relationships, and this pattern of communication is established early in life through the attachment between a mother and her infant (1h36m6s).
• In a good relationship, turn-taking behaviors are smooth and effortless, and this pattern of communication can be observed even in conversations between strangers, as seen in the conversation between the two individuals (1h36m33s).

Tool: Text Message, Communication, Relationships (1h36m47s)

• Text messaging has become a dominant mode of communication, but it lacks most of the essential elements of human interaction, such as emotional cues, tone, and latency, which can be detrimental to building and reinforcing communication (1h36m50s).
• The left hemisphere of the brain is becoming more dominant in today's society, which can be a problem, as it can lead to a lack of interpersonal dynamics and an over-reliance on text-based communication (1h38m35s).
• Some experts, like Ian, believe that the left hemisphere's dominance can be a huge problem, and that the right hemisphere is being neglected, leading to issues with emotional intelligence and interpersonal relationships (1h38m44s).
• A rule of thumb is to avoid arguing over text, as it can be devoid of emotional cues and can lead to misunderstandings, and instead, pick up the phone or engage in face-to-face conversations (1h39m7s).
• There is a hierarchy of effectiveness in communication, with text messaging being at the bottom, followed by voice memos, phone calls, and handwritten letters, with face-to-face interactions being the most effective (1h40m9s).
• Handwritten letters, in particular, hold a special significance, as they require effort and reflection, and can be a meaningful way to connect with others, even if it's not a real-time exchange (1h40m25s).
• The act of writing letters can help individuals reflect on themselves and their emotions, and can be a powerful way to make connections with others (1h41m11s).
• However, for certain personality types, texting can be a convenient and effective way to communicate, especially for those who are more left-brained (1h41m32s).
• In addition to face-to-face interactions, other ways to feed the right brain include traveling, being in nature, and engaging in activities that promote creativity and emotional intelligence (1h41m51s).
• There are concerns that the changes in communication styles, particularly the rise of text messaging, may not be entirely positive, and may lead to a decline in emotional intelligence and interpersonal skills (1h42m12s).

Right Brain Dominance & Activities; Tool: Fostering the Right Brain (1h42m18s)

• The highest levels of human nature are found in the right brain, which is responsible for intuition, drawing on body sensations, imagery, creativity, and processing novel information (1h42m42s).
• The right brain is dominant in various activities, including creativity, metaphors, imagination, humor, music, poetry, art, morality, passion, and spirituality, with love being the most spectacular (1h43m58s).
• Activities that allow individuals to "drop into" their right brain circuitry include interacting with nature, walking, and practicing wide-range attention, which is associated with the right brain (1h44m38s).
• Wide-range attention involves an evenly suspended attention and a widening of gaze, as opposed to the narrow gaze and attention associated with the left brain (1h45m1s).
• When individuals are in nature and walking, they tend to be in panoramic vision, taking in their surroundings in a more spherical and less focused manner (1h45m28s).
• The right brain is also dominant in processing novel information, and the pursuit of a curious mind and open experiences can help keep the right brain active (1h47m15s).
• In therapy, there has been too much emphasis on technique, and research shows that the right brain process is key to making long-term changes, with psychotherapy being more effective than other forms like CBT (1h46m51s).
• The right brain is also responsible for the release of noradrenaline in response to new experiences, which can help keep the mind curious and open (1h47m26s).
• Encouraging patients to engage in activities that stimulate the right brain, such as journaling, free associating, listening to music, and taking walks, can be beneficial outside of therapy sessions (1h45m55s).
• Seeking new experiences in different parts of the world can bring up new challenges and help feed curiosity, as stated by Einstein, and can be achieved through activities such as travel, which can be a fortunate gift that leads to new relationships and friendships (1h47m42s).
• Novelty and sharing new experiences with others can be another way to stimulate personal growth and development (1h48m43s).
• Exercise is a key factor in the healing process, both physically and mentally, and is fundamental to restorative sleep, according to scientist Navio from San Diego (1h48m54s).
• Taking care of one's body is essential, and this is often learned through early experiences, primarily taught through the body, which is not always seen in certain pathologies (1h49m27s).
• The ability to reflect inward and look back upon oneself is crucial, allowing individuals to see what they want to see and don't want to see, which is an important aspect of personal growth and self-awareness (1h49m57s).

Defenses, Blind Spots (1h50m10s)

• Defenses can be both adaptive and maladaptive, and they play a crucial role in protecting individuals from overwhelming experiences, with examples including dissociation and repression (1h50m15s).
• Dissociation is a defense mechanism that helps individuals cope with overwhelming experiences, while repression is a defense that can be normal and adaptive or maladaptive, depending on its strength (1h50m23s).
• When repression is strong, the left hemisphere of the brain shuts out information from the right hemisphere, highlighting the importance of becoming aware of one's defenses (1h50m43s).
• Individuals often have blind spots that they cannot see themselves, but can only become aware of through feedback from others, particularly those they trust (1h51m0s).
• Intimate relationships and close relationships are essential for personal growth and change, as they provide a safe space for individuals to share their experiences and receive feedback (1h51m33s).
• Trusting others and being open to negative feedback is crucial for overcoming blind spots and achieving personal growth (1h51m52s).
• Emotions, including negative ones, have adaptive value and are essential for personal growth, and individuals should strive to be familiar with and understand all types of emotions (1h52m44s).
• Rather than suppressing or avoiding negative emotions, individuals should allow themselves to feel and process these emotions, as they can ultimately lead to personal growth and transformation (1h52m20s).
• Allowing oneself to fully experience and process emotions can help individuals move forward and find new perspectives, as emotions can shape and change over time (1h52m36s).

Creativity, Accessing the Right Brain, Insight (1h53m14s)

• Some individuals, such as a songwriter and Joni Mitchell, engage in activities like painting or drawing to stimulate their creativity and "grease the gears" for their main vocation, which in these cases is songwriting, and this process may be an unconscious way of tapping into right brain circuitry and increasing its activity (1h53m15s).
• This technique can be seen as a way to access creativity, which is the ability to see something novel in a new way and look at the same thing through new eyes (1h54m11s).
• Artists often know how to get out of the left brain and into the right brain, and this can be seen as a form of surrender, allowing them to access their creative potential (1h54m25s).
• A period of self-study and exploration can be beneficial for personal growth and learning, as it allows individuals to move beyond their usual ways of thinking and understanding (1h54m42s).
• Engaging in creative activities, such as playing the piano, can be a way to access the right brain and develop new skills and ways of thinking (1h54m59s).
• Visualization and musical capacity can be developed through practice and exploration, allowing individuals to access new ways of thinking and understanding (1h55m32s).
• The process of learning and growth can be intuitive, and individuals may find themselves drawn to new activities and ways of thinking without fully understanding why (1h56m24s).
• Exploration and discovery can be a key part of the learning process, and individuals may find that they are able to master new skills and areas of knowledge through this process (1h56m55s).
• The AHA experience, or moment of sudden insight, is often associated with the right brain, and there is evidence to suggest that this type of experience is an important part of the learning and creative process (1h57m1s).
• Insights can come quickly and suddenly, often seeming to appear out of nowhere, and can be triggered by experiences that make sense in retrospect (1h57m9s).
• Memorization can be a waste of time and effort, and instead, it's more effective to focus on understanding information in a way that allows for deeper comprehension (1h57m33s).
• This approach to learning can lead to the development of an enormous memory, where one knows where to find information, how to access it, and what's important (1h57m56s).
• Writing down information can help solidify it in memory, and taking physical notes, such as Xeroxing papers and reading them at a desk, can be a more effective learning technique than reading and studying on a computer (1h58m10s).
• Developing a personalized learning process through introspection can help individuals absorb information more effectively and retain it in their long-term memory (1h58m58s).
• The left hemisphere of the brain is associated with surface-level processing, while the right hemisphere is associated with deeper, more emotional experiences that can be stored in autobiographical memory (1h59m8s).
• Experiences that evoke strong emotions can be stored more deeply in memory than information that is simply memorized, and can be recalled more easily at any point in time (1h59m20s).

Paternal Leave, Parent-Child Relationships, Attachment (1h59m31s)

• The right brain circuitry and autonomic synchrony between the primary caretaker, typically the mother, and the infant are extremely important, especially during the earliest years of life (1h59m31s).
• The amount of time spent with the child during this period is crucial, but many parents struggle to balance work and family responsibilities due to a lack of support from the culture (1h59m49s).
• In contrast, other rich countries, such as those in Scandinavia, provide more generous parental leave policies, with three months of paternal leave and six months or more of maternal leave (2h0m30s).
• These policies recognize the critical importance of the earliest years in shaping a child's personality and values, and that this is the time when parents should be investing in their relationship with their child (2h0m44s).
• In the United States, most people return to work after just six weeks, which is at the beginning of the critical period for the right brain, autonomic nervous system, and amygdala development (2h1m10s).
• Research has shown that the best predictors of adult satisfaction in life are emotion and conduct, rather than IQ, highlighting the need to focus on emotional development and regulation in early childhood (2h2m2s).
• The London School of Economics found that the best childhood predictor of adult satisfaction in life is emotion, followed by conduct, and then IQ, suggesting that the current focus on executive functions and IQ is misguided (2h1m58s).
• The UNICEF has reported that the United States ranks last in emotional well-being and childhood well-being among 36 rich countries, highlighting the need for a shift in priorities (2h2m49s).
• The importance of emotional transfer and regulation in early childhood cannot be overstated, and parents and caregivers should prioritize this aspect of development over mere knowledge transfer (2h3m46s).
• The conversation highlights the need for a more nuanced understanding of child development, one that takes into account the critical role of emotional development and regulation in shaping a child's personality and values (2h4m7s).

Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow & Reviews, Sponsors, YouTube Feedback, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter (2h5m16s)

• To access links to Dr. Alan Shaw's books, please refer to the show notes or captions, and consider subscribing to the YouTube channel as a zero-cost way to provide support (2h5m16s).
• Following the podcast on Spotify and Apple, and leaving a five-star review, are also zero-cost ways to provide support (2h5m32s).
• The podcast is sponsored by several organizations, and their support is greatly appreciated (2h5m40s).
• Questions, comments, and suggestions for future podcast topics can be left in the YouTube comments section (2h5m48s).
• A new book titled "Protocols: An Operating Manual for the Human Body" is now available for pre-sale at protocolsbook.com, covering protocols for various aspects of human health and wellness (2h5m57s).
• The book is based on over 30 years of research and experience, and provides scientific substantiation for the included protocols (2h6m5s).
• Links to various vendors can be found on the book's website, allowing readers to choose their preferred vendor (2h6m25s).
• Dr. Andrew Huberman can be followed on social media platforms, including Instagram, X (formerly Twitter), LinkedIn, Facebook, and Threads, where he discusses science and science-based tools (2h6m37s).
• The Neural Network Newsletter is a zero-cost monthly newsletter that includes podcast summaries and brief PDFs covering various protocols, and can be subscribed to at hubermanlab.com (2h7m0s).
• The newsletter is completely free, and email addresses are not shared with anyone (2h7m25s).