Discipline, Motivation & The Champion’s Mindset - Chris Bumstead (4K)

14 Oct 2024 (1 month ago)
Discipline, Motivation & The Champion’s Mindset - Chris Bumstead (4K)

Hoping to Win a 6th Olympia (0s)

  • The goal for the Olympia competition is to bring the best package and win, which is very important, especially after overcoming many adversities and challenges over the years (11s).
  • Sharing success with someone else, such as a partner, is crucial as it adds a new level of meaning and joy to the experience, and helps to regulate and push through difficult times (44s).
  • Having a partner to share the experience with prevents the need to numb emotions and brings people closer together, resulting in double the amount of joy (1m26s).
  • The sacrifices that come with success, including mental peace, are significant, and it's essential to find a balance between achieving success and maintaining mental well-being (1m57s).
  • The biggest sacrifice made for success is often the loss of mental peace, and the goal is to find a way to maintain mental peace while thriving at a high level (2m36s).
  • There is a tension between being a high performer and not having a neurotic drive or ambient anxiety, which can be a challenge to overcome, and it's unclear if it's possible to have one without the other (2m52s).
  • The anxiety and neuroticism that often come with being a high performer can be a driving force for perfectionism, but it's essential to find a balance and not let it consume one's life (3m8s).
  • Maintaining success for an extended period can be challenging due to the constant drive to improve and the pressure to perform, which can create anxiety and a sense of not doing enough, but this drive can also be a motivator to keep pushing forward (3m49s).
  • There are two different mindsets when achieving success: one where the person feels satisfied and done, and another where they feel the need to do better and maintain their success, with the latter being a more challenging mindset to adopt (4m0s).
  • Finding a balance between being grateful for the privilege of success and the pressure to perform is crucial, and it's possible to find meaning and enjoyment in the process of working hard and overcoming challenges (4m21s).
  • People often say that you find meaning in suffering, but it's only meaningful if you're choosing to do something difficult and benefiting from it, rather than just hurting yourself for no reason (4m47s).
  • Having a mentality that drives you to constantly improve and achieve more can be a double-edged sword, as it can lead to a never-ending cycle of striving for more, but it's also what drives people to achieve greatness (5m6s).
  • Research suggests that motivation and drive can come from a secure place rather than self-criticism, but this may not be enough to achieve greatness, as people like Michael Jordan, who have achieved incredible success, often have a different mindset and are willing to make sacrifices to achieve their goals (5m41s).
  • Ultimately, achieving greatness requires a willingness to make sacrifices and push oneself to the limit, both physically and psychologically, and it's not for everyone, but for those who are willing to put in the work, it can be a rewarding and fulfilling experience (6m3s).
  • The level of sacrifice required to be a champion can be extreme, contributing to performance in a specific domain, but also opening oneself up to potential risks and negative consequences, such as damage to relationships and health (6m32s).
  • The example of Eddie Hall, World's Strongest Man in 2017 or 2018, is given, where he sacrificed his relationships and health to achieve his goal, and if he hadn't won, he believed he would be dead, divorced, and without a relationship with his child (6m43s).
  • To beat someone like Eddie Hall, one would have to be prepared to make similar sacrifices, which can be a heavy price to pay, and it's essential to consider whether one is willing to make such sacrifices to achieve their goals (7m19s).
  • The importance of understanding the level of sacrifice required to be a champion is highlighted, and it's noted that some competitors may be willing to do things that hurt their bodies more than others, which can be a concern (7m37s).
  • The speaker reflects on their own willingness to sacrifice things to win, stating that they are not willing to sacrifice their health, family, or mental peace, and that they have to balance their desire to win with their internal values and definition of success (7m51s).
  • The speaker emphasizes the importance of building their own definition of success and not solely relying on external validation, and that they compete because they want to win and be the best in the world (8m17s).
  • The speaker acknowledges that competing has taken away things they love, but they love winning more, and they have to constantly check in with themselves to ensure they are lining up their values and not sacrificing too much (8m50s).
  • The speaker concludes that their values are bigger than their desire to win, and their success at the end of their life is beyond hurting themselves to achieve it (9m0s).

What’s Next for Chris? (9m20s)

  • Life is taken year by year, and the goal is to be grateful for the opportunity to compete again, with the mindset that every additional year is a bonus (9m21s).
  • In 2019, the decision was made to retire after winning the Olympia, but the feeling was relief rather than enjoyment, due to health issues and stress (9m25s).
  • The experience of being in the hospital in 2018 due to autoimmune issues made it clear that health is the top priority, and competing is not worth sacrificing well-being (9m53s).
  • Every year since then has been approached with the goal of being better and finding the drive and excitement to compete, while prioritizing health and not sacrificing values (10m11s).
  • The focus is on private victories, such as managing daily stress and staying calm in difficult situations, which may not be recognized by others but are still important accomplishments (11m5s).
  • Journaling and gratitude practices can help appreciate these private victories, as well as having a close relationship with someone who can share in the struggles and successes (11m32s).
  • A supportive partner, like a wife, can be more proud of personal growth and authenticity than external achievements, such as winning competitions (11m49s).
  • The example of Benjiro's wife, who is not impressed by his external achievements but values their personal relationship, illustrates the importance of having someone who sees beyond external success (12m9s).

Preparing for the Olympia (13m10s)

  • The current prep stage has been a struggle with moments of feeling behind, but the pressure has driven progress and the body is now healthy and ready to roll (13m11s).
  • At three weeks out from the competition, the daily caloric intake is around 2,200 calories, which will be reduced to 1,500-1,600 calories, with a goal of losing nine pounds in three weeks (13m54s).
  • Dealing with hunger during a cut is difficult, but having a driving passion, such as winning the Mr. Olympia, helps to stay motivated (14m38s).
  • Consistency is key, and having done this consistently for a decade has made it easier to handle the mental aspect of dieting for a competition (14m49s).
  • Momentum is huge, and being able to do something consistently helps to build habits and make it easier to stick to a diet (14m46s).
  • Having a system in place, such as weighing and planning food, helps to make the process easier and less mentally taxing (14m54s).
  • Creating exciting daily victories, such as tracking progress and achieving small goals, helps to stay motivated and focused (15m39s).
  • Weighing oneself multiple times a day can help to track progress and make adjustments to the diet and training as needed (15m42s).
  • Having a mindset that is focused on progress and improvement, rather than being obsessed with food, helps to make the process more manageable (15m50s).
  • There is a sadistic aspect to bodybuilding, where pushing oneself to the limit and feeling tired and hungry can be a motivator (16m6s).
  • Achieving a high level of leanness is mentally exciting, and it's about beating past versions of oneself, as the physical aspect is no longer a challenge, with no crazy diet hacks, just eating the same thing every day but reducing the amounts over time (16m40s).
  • A refeed day, or rebound day, after a competition like the Olympia, is not about bingeing, but rather eating the same food as usual, just in larger quantities, with occasional treats like cookies or muffins (17m3s).
  • Having a refeed day is about listening to intuition and allowing oneself to enjoy certain foods, like cookies, in moderation, without stressing about the potential impact on progress (17m45s).
  • Developing intuition over time helps in making decisions about food and training, and it's essential to know what will hold you back and what won't, allowing for a more balanced approach to diet and training (17m59s).
  • Being mindful and prepared is crucial, especially when it comes to competitions, but there are times when it's essential to trust in one's abilities and experience, and not overthink things (18m12s).
  • Having experience and confidence can help in being more relaxed and prepared, even in challenging situations, like doing multiple episodes of a podcast in a short amount of time (18m25s).
  • Trusting in one's abilities and experience can also help in being more articulate and prepared for conversations, like podcasts, without feeling the need to overprepare or try to learn new things (18m54s).
  • A realization was made that living life to present it to people on social media was not desirable, and instead, a shift was made to focus on living life authentically, rather than trying to sound cool or smart for the sake of online appearances (19m4s).
  • A podcast opportunity arose, and initial concerns about not having anything to say were alleviated by the realization that sharing personal truths and stories was more important than trying to be the "smart guy" (19m16s).
  • A year-long experiment was conducted to try various Green strength products, ultimately leading to the discovery of AG1, which has been used for over three years due to its comprehensive and rigorously formulated blend of 75 vitamins, minerals, and Whole Food Sourced ingredients (19m34s).
  • AG1's benefits include increased energy and focus, improved digestion, and a supported immune system, all without the need for multiple products or pills (19m57s).
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What Chris Would Tell His Younger Self (20m36s)

  • A key lesson learned is that one doesn't need to be great, being oneself is enough, and this realization can bring relief and a shift in focus towards what truly matters in life (21m1s).
  • This mindset is rooted in the idea that people often feel compelled to achieve great things to gain acceptance, validation, and praise, which is driven by a desire for self-worth (22m12s).
  • This drive for self-worth can stem from societal expectations and the pressure to succeed, which can be overwhelming and unnecessary (22m34s).
  • Having a child and reflecting on one's own childhood experiences can help put things into perspective and make one realize that relationships, values, and experiences are more important than achieving greatness (21m15s).
  • The distinction between extrinsic goals, such as trying to be the best in the world, and intrinsic goals, such as being one's best self, is important, and setting authentic goals can help alleviate pressure and focus on what truly matters (22m58s).
  • Even achieving great things, like winning the Olympia, can be unauthentic if it's driven by a need to be great rather than a genuine desire to push oneself to be their best (23m5s).
  • Having privilege can also bring pressure to perform well, and recognizing this can help individuals understand the weight of their responsibilities and the importance of staying true to themselves (23m46s).
  • Ultimately, being oneself and showing up at one's best, regardless of external circumstances, is what truly matters, and this mindset can bring a sense of freedom and fulfillment (23m31s).
  • A person who has achieved great success, such as a six-time Mr. Olympia winner, may feel pressure to continue performing at a high level, driven by the unconscious assumption that they are not enough unless they achieve great things (23m51s).
  • This mindset can lead to a constant pursuit of greatness, but it's essential to consider the outcome and the impact on one's mental state, questioning whether the feeling of greatness is worth the price (24m22s).
  • Becoming a world champion may require an unusual mindset, and most people may not think they have what it takes to achieve such a goal (24m34s).
  • Confidence is not about false bravado or arrogance, but rather about being honest and truthful with oneself, acknowledging doubts and fears (24m56s).
  • True confidence is about being realistic and acknowledging the uncertainty of achieving a goal, rather than creating a gap between one's beliefs and reality, which can lead to stress and poor performance (25m29s).
  • Unwavering confidence is a lie, and fears never completely go away, but rather, it's about being honest and truthful with oneself (25m44s).

Unwavering Confidence is a Lie (25m48s)

  • Despite being a champion, there is always lingering doubt in the mind, and it's normal to have such feelings, even for top performers (26m4s).
  • The concept of a "champion mentality" implies that there are no set rules for being a champion, and it's about finding what works for each individual to win (26m39s).
  • A story about sports reporter Matthew Sayad's experience at Wimbledon highlights how different top athletes, such as Djokovic, Federer, and Nadal, have unique approaches to their sport, and what works for one may not work for another (26m45s).
  • Each athlete must find their own way to succeed, and trying to emulate someone else's approach can be like trying to wear someone else's shoes - it won't fit (28m6s).
  • The key to success is building intuition and trusting oneself, allowing individuals to get into a flow state and act on instinct (28m22s).
  • Fear is a natural feeling that never completely goes away, but it can be transformed into excitement by reframing one's mindset and focusing on the positive aspects of a situation (29m8s).
  • Embracing stress and anxiety as a natural part of the human experience can be an effective way to handle performance-related pressure, but impending fear of health issues requires a different approach, such as giving the feeling validation and vocalizing it out loud (29m15s).
  • Vocalizing feelings out loud and sharing them with a trusted partner can help regulate emotions and provide a sense of ease and calmness (29m56s).
  • Being introverted and logical can make it challenging to acknowledge and express emotions, leading to a tendency to diminish feelings through logical reasoning, which may not fully eliminate the anxiety (29m59s).
  • Sharing feelings with a partner, in this case, the wife, can help validate emotions and provide reassurance, leading to a sense of calmness and relaxation (30m28s).
  • It's essential to acknowledge and express feelings rather than trying to numb or logically explain them away, as this can lead to a buildup of emotions (30m49s).
  • Feeling shame about experiencing fear can lead to a cycle of negative emotions, including guilt, frustration, and self-criticism, which can be detrimental to mental health (31m5s).
  • Practicing mindfulness can help catch and acknowledge these negative emotions, allowing for a more constructive approach to managing feelings (31m46s).
  • Recognizing and challenging self-critical thoughts can help break the cycle of negative emotions and promote a more compassionate and understanding mindset (31m55s).
  • Being conscious of one's thoughts and being able to listen to them can help alleviate anxiety and make one feel more human, and sharing these thoughts with trusted people can make one feel less crazy (32m10s).
  • Having intrusive thoughts is normal, and it's a human response to overthink and try to avoid fear and pain (32m30s).
  • Sharing personal fears and struggles, even if they seem boring or unremarkable, can resonate with others and help them feel less alone (33m4s).
  • Being transparent about one's fears and struggles, rather than just sharing successes, can be helpful for others who may be experiencing similar things (33m12s).
  • As an introspective person, it's possible to explore the finer points of psychology and understand one's own thoughts and behaviors (33m36s).
  • Having a child can bring up new and intense fears, such as the fear of accidentally harming them, but it's normal to have these thoughts and sharing them with others can be helpful (32m34s).
  • Avoiding pain and fear is a natural human response, and recognizing this can help individuals understand and manage their own thoughts and behaviors (32m59s).

What if Chris Hadn’t Gone for it? (33m46s)

  • Life would have been difficult to imagine without pursuing bodybuilding, as it's hard to say where one would end up without this life, and the effort put into it would be hard to put into something not loved (33m48s).
  • When young, people are told they can be anything, but then realize it's a lie, and then realize they're telling themselves it's a lie because they're not willing to work hard enough to achieve their goals (34m1s).
  • It's a back-and-forth process of questioning whether one can achieve their goals or if it's just too hard, and it's easier to believe it's a lie than to admit not being willing to work hard enough (34m22s).
  • Being passionate about bodybuilding and being genetically built for it, both mentally and physically, made it the perfect position to be in (34m37s).
  • The effort put into bodybuilding would be hard to put into something not loved, and it's hard to think about where one would end up without this life (34m54s).
  • If the decision to pursue bodybuilding hadn't been made in 2017, life would have been different, involving partying, drinking, and being in college, but the decision to stop that lifestyle and focus on bodybuilding was made (35m1s).
  • Taking risks and being young provided the greatest opportunity to take risks and fail, and being ignorant to the price that would have to be paid was beneficial (35m30s).
  • Knowing the outcomes and the price that would have to be paid might have made the decision to pursue bodybuilding more difficult, but being young and ignorant made it easier to take the risk (35m40s).
  • Being "young, dumb, and full of hope" or "made of rubber and magic" allows for a greater ability to bounce back from difficulties and setbacks (36m0s).
  • As one gets older, it becomes more difficult to deal with challenges and setbacks, and it's necessary to actually deal with problems rather than using momentum or distraction to get through them (36m26s).
  • The goal is to come out the other side of challenges and difficulties and be "anti-fragile," going from unconscious competence to conscious incompetence to conscious competence (36m41s).
  • Moving to America at 33 years old was a significant life decision, and it felt like a risk to change careers and try to make it in a competitive city with no visa and living in an Airbnb (37m12s).
  • It's possible to discover the limit of what one is truly capable of, and achieving that point can be a driving force, but it's also important to consider the sacrifices made for success and find a balance (37m44s).
  • Sports can be used as an analogy for life, with tightly defined parameters of success and failure, making it clear when one has won or lost, but other areas of life may not have such clear-cut definitions (38m12s).
  • Even in winning, there can be a desire to improve and do better, and it's possible to find ways to want more even in the act of achieving success (38m34s).
  • The past 12 months have been the hardest working period, with an unrelenting effort, but there's also a desire to look back with pride and know that everything possible was achieved (38m49s).
  • After a while, it's natural to think about the sacrifices made for success and how to achieve 98% of the outcome with only 50% of the pain, and find areas where it's possible to claw back some quality of life (39m19s).
  • Having tightly defined parameters of success and failure can be a double-edged sword, making it easy to measure success but also risking the outcome by pulling back even a little (39m40s).
  • In business, it's not always about being the number one, but about creating a cool company that facilitates a desired lifestyle and gives back to the industry (39m59s).
  • Some people may feel less pressure to be the best in certain areas, such as building a cool company, but may feel more pressure in other areas, such as a podcast (40m20s).
  • Some individuals feel pressure to be the best, which can alleviate some pressure on the effort they put into their business, but for others, their business is their top priority, and they strive to be the number one in their field, such as being the number one energy drink in the world (40m35s).

The Pursuit is Greater Than the Prize (40m41s)

  • Greater fulfillment is found in the journey of pursuing goals rather than the moment of achieving them, as it allows for the discovery of one's capabilities (40m42s).
  • Overcoming challenges and setbacks, such as injuries and self-doubt, can lead to a deeper understanding of one's capabilities and a stronger belief in oneself (40m57s).
  • The journey towards a goal is filled with moments of beauty and accomplishment, even in the midst of difficulties, such as intense workouts or strict diets (41m42s).
  • These daily experiences and struggles are a crucial part of the human experience and contribute to personal growth and development (42m12s).
  • Celebrating small, mundane victories can be just as important as acknowledging grand accomplishments, and can be done through practices such as keeping a "well done" list (42m35s).
  • A "well done" list allows individuals to note down and reflect on their daily achievements, no matter how small they may seem, and can help build self-pride and confidence (42m41s).
  • Practicing self-reflection and acknowledging daily accomplishments can help individuals develop a greater sense of self-awareness and self-appreciation (43m27s).
  • Recognizing and celebrating small victories can contribute to personal growth and development over time, and can help individuals become a person they can be proud of (43m52s).
  • The pursuit of goals is often more important than achieving them, as the journey and the process of working towards a goal can be more fulfilling than the actual achievement itself (44m18s).
  • Having things is not as enjoyable as getting things, and the process of striving for something can be more enjoyable than the end result (44m36s).
  • Achievements can be seen as "false peaks," where reaching one goal only leads to the realization that there is another, higher goal to strive for (45m8s).
  • Being a parent is not just about having a child, but about showing up every day to be the best parent possible for the rest of their life (45m31s).
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Experiencing Parenthood (46m45s)

  • The experience of watching a wife give birth naturally, without painkillers, is described as the most insane thing ever experienced, with the wife showing incredible strength and endurance throughout the process (46m45s).
  • The wife's decision to give birth naturally was supported, with the husband providing physical support and distraction from the pain by pinching her traps as hard as he could (47m6s).
  • The experience of childbirth and taking care of a newborn has given a new appreciation for mothers and women, who handle the challenges of childbirth and childcare with strength and resilience (48m10s).
  • Having children is a wake-up call, as they will eventually see their parents as human and flawed, rather than as heroes or gods, and will be aware of their parents' faults and imperfections (48m35s).
  • This realization brings a sense of responsibility and accountability, as parents must work on their own problems and faults in order to be good role models for their children and not pass on their negative traits (48m58s).
  • The constant presence and awareness of children means that parents cannot hide their true selves, and must be authentic and genuine in their interactions with their children (49m11s).
  • The experience of parenthood is likened to a permanent state of accountability, similar to a Navy SEAL hell week that never stops, with every interaction and decision being scrutinized and remembered by the children (49m30s).
  • Accountability and being one's best self is crucial, especially when it comes to fatherhood, as it sets an example for children and can be seen as a performance sport, with the goal of being a good role model (50m0s).
  • A powerful moment of love and connection was experienced when lying down with a fussy baby, Bradley, who eventually fell asleep on the chest, and this moment helped to put things into perspective and alleviate pressure to perform (50m25s).
  • This experience made morals and values of family, relationships, and love stronger, and helped to separate these from extrinsic goals of winning in competition (51m30s).
  • For many, the gym can serve as a safe haven, a place where progress can be made and a sense of control can be felt, even when other areas of life are not going well (51m43s).
  • Having a child can provide an even more indestructible safe haven, as looking at a picture of the child can bring comfort and improve one's mood (52m36s).
  • Fatherhood can be a perspective-changing experience, and it can take time for the fatherhood compulsion to kick in, but it can ultimately lead to a stronger sense of responsibility and love (53m1s).
  • A meeting with high-powered entrepreneurs took an unexpected turn when one of the attendees asked for advice on being a good father, as his wife was eight months pregnant and he was feeling uncertain about his role (53m8s).
  • This feeling of uncertainty is reportedly common among future dads, who may feel disconnected from the pregnancy process due to the physical and hormonal changes their wives are experiencing (53m35s).
  • The transition to feeling like a good father can be sudden and intense, with one moment standing out as a turning point, such as seeing a joke online that highlighted the differences in roles between mothers and fathers (54m11s).
  • Feeling useless and helpless during the pregnancy and early parenthood can be a challenge for fathers, who may feel like they're not contributing enough or can't help their wives in the way they want to (54m41s).
  • This feeling of uselessness can lead to guilt and a desire to be more involved, but it's essential for fathers to remember that their presence and emotional support can be just as valuable as their physical contributions (55m34s).
  • The feeling of being on the sidelines and providing moral support can continue for several months after the birth, with fathers taking on a coaching role and providing encouragement to their wives (55m59s).
  • The provided text snippet does not contain sufficient information to create a comprehensive summary about the topic 'Discipline, Motivation & The Champion’s Mindset' as it appears to be a short and incomplete segment of a conversation, possibly about sports or teamwork, but does not mention the main topic or Chris Bumstead (56m15s).

How to Let Go of Perfectionism (56m23s)

  • Perfectionism can be a challenge in various areas of life, including business, branding, and personal relationships, but it's essential to find a balance and not strive for perfection in every aspect (56m24s).
  • Having high standards in certain areas, such as bodybuilding or being a good father, can sometimes lead to being overly hard on oneself, but recognizing that not everything needs to be perfect can help alleviate this pressure (57m15s).
  • Competing at a high level in a physique sport like bodybuilding can be particularly challenging, as small factors like sleep and diet can significantly impact performance, leading some individuals to become overly obsessed with perfection (57m51s).
  • However, this obsession with perfection can ultimately lead to increased stress, which can negatively impact performance, making it essential to find a balance between striving for excellence and maintaining mental peace (58m29s).
  • Finding this balance involves identifying the point of diminishing returns, where the pursuit of perfection becomes more harmful than beneficial, and trusting one's intuition to make decisions (58m35s).
  • Having a supportive partner, like Chris's wife, can also be incredibly helpful in navigating areas where one may not have as much experience or confidence, such as child-rearing (59m0s).
  • Ultimately, recognizing that the stress of trying to be perfect can be more damaging than the imperfections themselves is crucial in achieving a healthy balance in life (59m25s).

Advice for Choosing a Good Partner (59m35s)

  • Being with someone who allows others to be their best selves can have a profound impact on one's life, and having a partner like that can be a life's greatest blessing (59m35s).
  • When choosing a good partner, it's essential to focus on what you're putting out into the world, rather than what you're looking for, as the law of attraction suggests that you attract what you put out (1h0m21s).
  • Being authentic, true to oneself, and putting out positive energy can help attract someone who appreciates and values those qualities (1h0m28s).
  • Putting on a show or chasing inauthentic goals can attract people who are interested in those superficial aspects, rather than the real person (1h0m42s).
  • The key to a successful relationship is finding someone who appreciates and values authenticity, as seen in the story of how Chris and his wife Courtney met, where she was drawn to his raw and emotional video (1h0m57s).
  • Courtney's nature is to be a loving and selfless person, making people feel safe and comfortable around her, and Chris tries to protect that energy (1h2m9s).
  • Having a partner who allows you to be your raw and authentic self can be incredibly beneficial, and trying to be someone else can lead to attracting someone who wouldn't have been interested in the real you (1h2m33s).
  • Attracting someone by being genuine and authentic is more important than putting on a facade, as people can only maintain a facade for so long before it becomes exhausting (1h3m3s).
  • Being in a relationship with someone who loves you for who you are, including your emotions and weaknesses, is crucial, and it's essential to find someone who makes you feel safe being a burden to them (1h3m28s).
  • The ability to be a burden to your partner and have them still show up and love you is a vital aspect of a healthy relationship, creating a sense of safety and love (1h3m31s).
  • Finding someone who you feel safe being vulnerable around is essential, as withholding emotions and putting on a show can prevent you from feeling truly safe and loved in the relationship (1h4m9s).
  • Being in a relationship where both partners feel safe being a burden to each other allows them to take on the world together, rather than dividing and conquering problems individually (1h4m23s).
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How Women Can Help Their Man Flourish (1h5m44s)

  • To help their man flourish emotionally, women should create an environment where he feels safe to express his emotions, and they should believe that sharing emotions is a sign of strength and confidence, not weakness (1h6m25s).
  • Women should understand that men often put on a facade to please them, and true confidence comes from being honest about their feelings, even when they're feeling down or emotional (1h6m58s).
  • When a man shares his emotions with his partner, it's essential for her to respond in a way that makes him feel strong and capable, rather than weak or judged (1h7m31s).
  • Women should recognize that men may feel nervous about sharing their emotions, even with their partner, due to societal expectations of masculinity and the fear of being seen as weak (1h7m59s).
  • It's essential for women to find a balance between allowing their partner to express emotions and maintaining a strong, masculine presence in the relationship (1h8m37s).
  • Women should understand that their partner's weaknesses and vulnerabilities are a natural part of the relationship, and that they can work together to find a balance that works for both of them (1h8m55s).
  • By being supportive and understanding, women can help their partner build trust and feel safe to express their emotions, which can ultimately lead to personal growth and a stronger relationship (1h9m28s).
  • Courtney, the partner mentioned in the conversation, has learned to trust and support her partner, Chris, as he has consistently shown up for her and proven himself to be a better man despite his weaknesses (1h9m30s).

Embracing the Highs & Lows of Life (1h9m37s)

  • Embracing both the highs and lows of life is essential to experiencing it fully, and this can be achieved by taking risks and being open to feeling a wide range of emotions (1h9m38s).
  • Many people tend to numb their emotions, sitting in a range of 40 to 60 on a scale of 0 to 100, rather than experiencing the full spectrum of human emotions (1h10m6s).
  • Expanding one's emotional range allows for a deeper experience of life, and this can be achieved by being open to feeling both positive and negative emotions (1h10m10s).
  • Having a "glass ceiling" of joy can limit one's ability to feel truly happy and excited, and this can be overcome by being willing to feel a wider range of emotions (1h10m19s).
  • The idea that one must feel the bad in order to feel the good is a key concept in expanding one's emotional range, and this can be achieved by being open to feeling and expressing all emotions (1h10m41s).
  • Embracing and expressing emotions can help to process and move through them more quickly, rather than letting them linger (1h11m8s).
  • Humans have a natural desire to feel and experience emotions, and this is a key part of the human experience (1h11m31s).
  • Accepting that there will be difficult times in life and being open to feeling and experiencing them can help to deepen one's emotional range and appreciation for life (1h11m38s).
  • Experiencing life fully is not just about external adventures and experiences, but also about being open to feeling and experiencing a wide range of emotions (1h11m53s).
  • Many people go through life without fully exploring their emotional range, and this can be a missed opportunity for growth and experience (1h12m27s).
  • The idea that sadness and fear are negative emotions is a cultural construct, and it is possible to view these emotions as a natural and necessary part of the human experience (1h12m47s).
  • Emotions are just feelings and do not have inherent value judgments, with no emotions being inherently "bad" as they all serve a purpose in processing life events (1h13m7s).
  • The guilt and agitation associated with certain emotions, such as fear and shame, often stem from societal expectations and teachings that these emotions should be accompanied by guilt and shame (1h13m33s).
  • Shame and fear are fundamental drivers of many negative emotions, with the fear of allowing oneself to feel certain emotions and the shame of having those emotions being significant factors (1h14m4s).
  • The desire to appear strong, competent, and in control can also contribute to the suppression of emotions and the struggle with shame and fear (1h14m25s).
  • As success and popularity grow, the pressure to maintain a certain image and the fear of being seen as vulnerable or incompetent can intensify the struggle with shame and fear (1h14m53s).
  • Personal uncertainty, health issues, and the impact of autoimmune disorders on cognitive function can exacerbate feelings of fear, shame, and frustration (1h15m6s).
  • The loss of competence in a key area, such as recalling words, can be particularly challenging and affect one's sense of value and identity (1h16m15s).
  • The intention behind goals and the alignment of one's path with their values can change over time, impacting mental well-being and creating uncertainty about the future (1h16m43s).
  • The goal of seeking knowledge and understanding is to gain a deeper understanding of oneself and the world, and this can be achieved by speaking to experts and taking away valuable insights from conversations (1h16m56s).
  • As one progresses, they start to layer on hope and expectation, and performance in a positive way, which can lead to pressure, but this pressure can be a driving force for growth and improvement (1h17m26s).
  • It's essential to separate one's value from their intelligence, and not to stress in the face of adversity, but instead, to view adversity as an opportunity for growth (1h18m3s).
  • Stress is a natural response to adversity, but it's crucial to prevent stress from leading to avoidance of adversity, and instead, to dive headfirst into challenges to foster growth (1h19m16s).
  • Embracing adversity and viewing it as a chance to grow can lead to personal development and success, and it's essential to redefine one's definition of success to include growth and progress (1h19m38s).
  • Chris Bumstead, a bodybuilder, shares his experience of overcoming adversity, such as tearing a lat muscle, and how he views it as an opportunity to grow and push himself beyond his limits (1h17m48s).
  • By reframing adversity as a chance for growth, one can develop a champion's mindset and achieve success in their endeavors (1h19m2s).

What is Your Definition of Success? (1h19m39s)

  • Success is defined as giving everything you've got, growing, and learning along the way, regardless of winning or losing, and understanding the big picture of your long-term goals (1h19m40s).
  • The biggest cheat code in life is going after your goals without being concerned about failing at a specific task, and instead focusing on the long-term picture (1h19m46s).
  • One's definition of success is based on their values, and it's essential to consider what you want to become in the long run, such as being the best partner, father, or person you can be (1h20m10s).
  • Short-term goals, like winning an Olympia, are important but should not define one's life, value, or worth; instead, focus on the big picture of who you want to become (1h20m40s).
  • It's crucial to consider how you want to win or lose, how you want to show up in your relationships, and who you want to become through the challenges and goals you face (1h20m55s).
  • Everything you choose to do and how you handle it shapes who you're becoming, and at the end of the day, you're the culmination of everything you've accomplished and how you accomplished it (1h21m21s).
  • The big picture is about what you want to become, and it's essential to understand that the outcomes you get are arbitrary, and it's the person behind the achievements that matters (1h22m1s).
  • Having a picture of yourself with or without achievements, such as Olympias, doesn't define who you are; it's about how you show up in your life every day and the lessons you learn from your pursuits (1h22m20s).
  • The goals you try to achieve or achieve can change you and cause you to be a different person, and it's essential to learn from those experiences and pass on the lessons to others (1h22m34s).

Accepting Where You Are Right Now (1h23m57s)

  • Everything changed when it was realized that people are not meant to feel excited and perfect all the time, and accepting that tough days are part of the process is crucial for growth and a meaningful life (1h23m58s).
  • The idea of pursuing happiness does not lead to happiness, but rather pursuing things that have meaning and that one cares about can lead to happiness as a byproduct (1h24m42s).
  • Constantly seeking happiness can lead to friction in life, but believing that hard times will lead to good times can create a more peaceful life (1h25m14s).
  • When going through a hard time, it's essential to appreciate that those moments allow us to appreciate the good ones, and it's okay to not be okay (1h25m26s).
  • To someone going through a string of bad days, it's essential to acknowledge that they are not alone, and a simple gesture of support can go a long way (1h25m42s).
  • "Lean into them" means accepting and processing bad days rather than numbing them with distractions, allowing oneself to feel and deal with emotions properly (1h26m2s).
  • Nowadays, it's easy to numb feelings with distractions like phones, but this can lead to anxiety and unresolved emotions, making it essential to acknowledge and deal with feelings rather than avoiding them (1h26m11s).
  • Ben Bergeron's quote "lean into discomfort as if you invited it through the door" emphasizes the importance of accepting and embracing discomfort rather than avoiding it (1h27m33s).
  • A phrase that resonates is being in control of one's frame, embracing challenges head-on, and taking control of emotions, rather than being controlled by fear, guilt, or shame (1h27m46s).
  • Bad days are a natural part of a good and meaningful life, and they contribute to the story of overcoming obstacles and achieving success (1h28m11s).
  • The idea is that without bad days, the story of one's life would be uneventful and lack glory, as there would be no challenges to overcome (1h28m32s).
  • The concept of fear exposure therapy is relevant, where actively choosing to face one's fears helps build confidence and overcome them (1h28m51s).
  • Taking control of one's emotions and choices, even in difficult situations, is a powerful way to build confidence and take back power (1h29m22s).
  • By choosing to feel and lean into difficult emotions, one can regain control and build confidence from a place of vulnerability (1h29m31s).
  • This mindset allows individuals to take their power back and build confidence from a place of self-awareness and emotional regulation (1h29m37s).

How to Avoid Being Too Cynical (1h29m41s)

  • Dr. Jim Zaki wrote a book called "Hope for Cynics" that explores the widespread nature of skepticism and cynicism, with cynicism being a more extreme and negative form of skepticism that involves a total rejection of everything (1h29m42s).
  • Cynicism can lead to hyper-analysis and hyper-criticism, causing people to become paralyzed and do nothing, instead opting to watch others' lives on social media and pretend they are happy (1h30m17s).
  • To avoid this, one should stop analyzing and criticizing themselves and others, and instead take action and try new things, even if it means failing (1h30m28s).
  • People find meaning in trying difficult things, not just in succeeding at them, and giving oneself permission to try and fail can be liberating (1h30m40s).
  • To avoid being too cynical, one should not get stuck in the "simulation" of social media and instead surround themselves with positive people and consume realistic content (1h30m55s).
  • Every day, people have the choice to surround themselves with positive or negative influences, and they should take control of their lives and make choices that promote growth and change (1h31m27s).
  • Sometimes, pushing oneself out of their comfort zone and taking risks is necessary for growth, and people should strive to live life to the fullest and have meaningful experiences (1h31m44s).
  • The concept of living life is simple, and people should focus on experiencing life, doing difficult things, and growing as individuals (1h31m54s).
  • The person to be admired is the one who has lived a full life, has many stories to tell, and is content with their experiences, and becoming that person requires taking action and doing something (1h32m28s).
  • People should strive to bring contentment and wisdom into their lives now, rather than waiting for the future, and be aware of the path they are on to avoid becoming stuck in a negative cycle (1h32m49s).
  • Many successful people achieve a lot of worldly success but seem to have no fun in the process, as seen in the stories of 300-400 famous people from history broken down by David SRA in his podcast (1h33m19s).
  • A story about a billionaire in his late 70s who still attends conferences and makes deals, but is driven by a compulsion to be busy and seek validation rather than a well-balanced desire to pursue his calling (1h33m55s).
  • This behavior is seen as a cautionary tale, as it can be a more seductive and publicly acceptable version of people who peak in their 40s and continue to repeat the same behaviors for decades (1h34m56s).
  • The ease of social media allows people to present a specific narrative about their lives, making it a responsibility for those with a platform to be honest, but they often have no reason to be (1h35m31s).
  • People who have worked hard to become successful often talk about optimization, efficiency, and perfection, but it's unknown whether they are truly happy or miserable (1h35m45s).
  • Young people may look up to these successful individuals as role models and try to emulate their behavior, which can be very dangerous if the role model is not transparent about their true feelings and experiences (1h36m26s).
  • It's also unknown how much self-knowledge people have, and how much of their transparency is performative, making it difficult to determine what is real and what is not (1h36m47s).
  • People often struggle with self-reflection and honesty due to various filters and incentives that obscure their true thoughts and feelings, making it challenging to express genuine opinions publicly (1h36m52s).
  • Even individuals who appear to be efficient and optimized in their lives, with morning and night routines, may not have time for introspection and may not truly understand themselves (1h37m22s).
  • A busy calendar can serve as a hedge against feeling emotions and existential pain, as it keeps individuals constantly engaged and distracted from self-reflection (1h37m45s).
  • This constant busyness can create a state of perpetual "dopamine party mode," preventing individuals from experiencing the emotional "hangover" that often follows periods of intense activity or stimulation (1h38m11s).
  • Ultimately, this avoidance of self-reflection can prevent individuals from confronting fundamental questions about their lives, such as their motivations, values, and sense of purpose (1h38m30s).

Learning to Say ‘No’ More (1h38m40s)

  • To be better at saying no, one must have leverage, which can be achieved by working hard and being in a successful position, allowing for more negotiating power when saying no to offers. (1h39m16s)
  • It's essential to stick to what is authentic and care about, rather than trying to please others or pursue inauthentic goals, as this builds trust and credibility. (1h39m38s)
  • Saying no to things that don't align with one's values or goals can open up more doors and opportunities in the long run, even if it means turning down significant amounts of money. (1h39m44s)
  • Having a clear sense of self and what one cares about is crucial in making decisions and saying no to things that don't align with those values. (1h40m15s)
  • Building leverage and being able to say no effectively takes time and effort, but it's worth it in the end, as it allows for more control and better opportunities. (1h41m2s)
  • Saying no to things that don't align with one's values or goals, even when it's difficult or unpopular, can ultimately lead to more trust and credibility in the long run. (1h41m20s)
  • The value of saying no is often not recognized, as people rarely get credit for saying no to things that others don't know about. (1h41m41s)
  • The concept of being a "grifter" or "shill" is often thrown around on the internet, but it's rarely acknowledged when individuals turn down opportunities or money that don't align with their values (1h42m6s).
  • Many people are quick to criticize and accuse others of being a "grifter" or "shill" without considering the opportunities they may have turned down, such as brand deals or sponsorships (1h42m42s).
  • The term "grifter" or "shill" has become diluted and is often used to describe anyone who is affiliated with a product or service, regardless of their actual involvement or opinions (1h44m31s).
  • A more accurate definition of a "grifter" or "shill" might be someone who is affiliated with a product or service that they wouldn't use if they weren't being paid for it (1h44m49s).
  • The perception of being a "grifter" or "shill" can depend on the individuals or brands involved, and some people may be more likely to be criticized for their affiliations than others (1h45m11s).
  • The example of Joe Rogan's Spotify deal is cited, where he was not initially criticized for being a "sellout" because both Spotify and Rogan have positive brand associations (1h45m15s).
  • It's difficult to win in situations where people are quick to criticize and accuse others of being a "grifter" or "shill", as even doing good deeds can be seen as self-serving if they are publicized (1h44m0s).
  • Equity in a deal is important as it involves alignment of value and credibility, and a sense of coolness when two high-value brands come together, which is why partnerships with certain companies may be viewed more favorably than others (1h45m30s).
  • In 2018, Gymshark reached out to collaborate, which was exciting at the time because they were a brand associated with cool events and athletes, but over the years, it felt like they strayed away from being a workout gym brand, causing a misalignment with personal values (1h46m4s).
  • After stepping away from the collaboration, Gymshark went through an internal process to re-evaluate their focus and decided to lean back into the gym culture, which aligns with the idea that the gym has been a source of success and personal growth (1h46m44s).
  • The gym has been instrumental in achieving physical and mental success, and the concept of bringing the gym to the world is something to be admired, as it has the potential to improve people's lives (1h47m3s).
  • A closer relationship has developed with Ben Francis and other members of the Gymshark team over the years, and their ability to maintain majority ownership while growing the business is a testament to their professionalism and success (1h47m31s).
  • Gymshark's morals, values, and careful selection of athletes are aspects of the company that are highly respected, and their business operations are something to be admired (1h48m7s).
  • The decision to re-partner with Gymshark felt perfect, and becoming a part-owner of the company, although a small stake, is a significant development (1h48m30s).
  • Gymshark offered a partnership, but it was not an equal partnership or ownership, despite the significant value of the offer, which was compared to a billion dollars (1h48m39s).
  • The partnership with Gymshark was well-received, and the company made improvements to their clothing line, which was already being purchased with personal funds (1h48m54s).
  • The quality of Gymshark's clothing was praised, with a specific shirt being mentioned as a favorite purchase, and the company's pivot in strategy has been successful (1h49m5s).

The Current State of Gym Culture (1h49m11s)

  • The current gym culture is an interesting time, with a shift from CrossFit to bodybuilding, hybrid training, and high-rock running, influenced by individuals such as Nick Bare and George Heaton (1h49m36s).
  • The trend of hybrid athlete training has become a huge deal, with even the speaker's partners trying to do an Iron Man and building an insurance line for it, although the speaker is not interested in participating (1h49m53s).
  • The speaker believes they have the perfect build for an Iron Man, but are not interested in doing one, and might consider a CrossFit-style event in the future instead (1h50m14s).
  • The fitness industry is going in two directions, with some leaders being emotionally open and vulnerable, while others are promoting affiliate deals for performance-enhancing drugs, creating a strange and slippery slope (1h50m50s).
  • The speaker is not on TikTok, but has heard that the platform is promoting affiliate deals for teenagers using performance-enhancing drugs, which is a concern (1h50m31s).
  • The speaker thinks that the promotion of peptides and other performance-enhancing substances is a gateway to more serious issues, and is a strange trend in the fitness industry (1h51m29s).
  • The speaker is interested in seeing how gym culture will evolve, as they did not predict the rise of CrossFit, hybrid athlete training, or the current trend of running and high-rock training (1h51m36s).
  • The speaker can understand the appeal of running as a form of meditation and mindfulness, and believes that it is a beautiful and meditative activity, despite being horrible at it themselves (1h52m42s).
  • The speaker thinks that run clubs and running in general are becoming popular as a way for people to find a moment of peace and meditation in a world with a lot of distraction (1h52m58s).
  • A large fitness event in Austin, attracting 500 participants every Saturday, is facing opposition from the city council. (1h53m3s)
  • The event is seen as a solution to issues like mental health, isolation, technology overuse, obesity, and diabetes, by promoting group fitness activities such as Barry's Boot Camp, CrossFit, and running clubs. (1h53m25s)
  • Despite concerns about young people's mental and physical health, the event is being challenged due to complaints from a resident about the view from their garden being obstructed by participants. (1h53m44s)
  • The situation is described as disappointing because the event is not disruptive, like graffiti or loud music, but simply involves young people running. (1h54m1s)

How Your Mind Impacts Your Training (1h54m29s)

  • There is a balance between being science-based and evidence-backed in training, and being able to work hard enough, as overthinking can be mentally fatiguing and prevent individuals from reaching their full potential (1h54m30s).
  • On tired days, especially during bodybuilding prep, focusing too much on proper execution and form can be mentally exhausting, making it difficult to push through to failure (1h55m29s).
  • Periodization programs that involve high volume and strength building can be mentally challenging, and individuals may struggle to reach failure due to mental fatigue rather than physical limitations (1h55m50s).
  • Holding oneself back by thinking too much can prevent individuals from achieving their full potential, and finding a balance between being optimal and allowing for pure aggression is necessary (1h56m21s).
  • A study found that individuals who were physically and mentally fatigued severely underestimated their capabilities, which is similar to the experience of bodybuilders during prep, where they may feel mentally and physically exhausted but still need to push through (1h56m45s).
  • It's essential to understand that mental fatigue can lead to underestimating one's strength and capabilities, and individuals need to learn to overpower their minds and push through to achieve their goals (1h57m36s).
  • Working with a science-based and evidence-backed trainer, such as Justin King, can help individuals understand the nuances of training and find a balance between being optimal and allowing for pure aggression (1h55m15s).
  • Overthinking can hold people back from achieving their goals, and sometimes a "beautiful stupidity" or "cultivated idiocy" can be beneficial in sports, where athletes focus on simple tasks like eating protein and lifting weights without over-optimizing their approach (1h57m49s).
  • This concept is illustrated by the "midwit meme," a bell curve showing a Neanderthal-like figure on the left, a midwit in the middle, and a sage on the right, with the joke being that the master and the idiot often arrive at the same conclusion (1h58m23s).
  • The key to success lies in trusting one's instincts and experience, rather than overthinking every detail, as athletes who have been in their sport for a long time can develop a sense of what their body needs and what they need to do to achieve their goals (1h59m7s).
  • It's essential to trust one's intuition and not overthink things, as this can lead to indecision and inaction, and instead, focus on taking action and doing what needs to be done (1h59m20s).

Be Worthy of Your Suffering (1h59m26s)

  • The concept of "being worthy of your suffering" refers to how one handles challenging situations and finds meaning in their experiences, rather than becoming a victim of complaining and misery (1h59m27s).
  • This idea is inspired by Victor Frankle's book "Man's Search for Meaning," which explores the concept of finding meaning in suffering (2h0m1s).
  • A personal experience that illustrates this concept is when Courtney, Chris's partner, gave birth to their child and remained calm and controlled throughout the process, finding meaning in her suffering (2h0m12s).
  • When life throws unexpected challenges, one can choose to show up with power and find meaning in the experience, rather than feeling powerless (2h0m58s).
  • After giving birth, women often experience a flood of hormones that can alter their memory of the experience, making it less painful in retrospect (2h1m19s).
  • This phenomenon is not immediate, but rather occurs over time, and can lead to women wanting to have another child despite the initial pain and trauma (2h1m35s).
  • The idea that women's minds can "retcon" their own experience of childbirth is a fascinating concept that highlights the complexities of human memory and perception (2h3m24s).
  • The conversation touches on the idea that this phenomenon may be a natural mechanism that allows women to cope with the trauma of childbirth and be willing to have more children (2h3m31s).

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