153. Listen Up, Leaders: A Record-Setting Coach’s Guide to Communication | Think Fast, Talk...

Introduction (0s)

• Matt Abrahams, a strategic communication instructor at Stanford Graduate School of Business, introduces his podcast "Think Fast, Talk Smart" and welcomes Tara VanDerveer, a renowned basketball coach.
• Tara VanDerveer, who served as Stanford University's women's basketball coach for 38 years, achieved remarkable success, leading the team to three national championships and accumulating the most wins of any basketball coach.
• Beyond Stanford, Tara coached the US national team to Olympic gold in 1996 and authored the book "Shooting from the Outside." Matt expresses his admiration for Tara's accomplishments and his excitement for their conversation.

Building Trust and Openness (59s)

• Trust and openness to feedback are crucial for the success of any team, especially in sports.
• Building a supportive environment where individuals feel comfortable being challenged and pushing themselves is essential for fostering trust and openness.
• Strong relationships with players, built on genuine care and effective communication, are fundamental to a coach's success.

Communicating Under Pressure (1m52s)

• Prioritizing Communication Under Pressure: Coaches need to be masters of concise communication, especially during timeouts and when addressing referees. The key is to identify the most pressing issue ("putting out the biggest fire") and focus on that. The speaker emphasizes the importance of being clear and concise, adjusting the number of points addressed based on the time available.
• Leveraging Assistant Coaches: The speaker values the input of assistant coaches, using them to gather information about the team's needs and relay that information to the players. This collaborative approach helps ensure the team receives the most relevant and impactful message.
• Viewing Referees as Partners: The speaker emphasizes the importance of viewing referees as partners in the game, rather than adversaries. This mindset can influence communication and potentially lead to a more positive and productive interaction. The speaker shares a personal anecdote about a referee wanting a picture with him, highlighting the potential for positive relationships even in high-pressure situations.

Motivation and Focus (5m24s)

• Maintaining Motivation During Tough Times: The speaker emphasizes the importance of establishing a consistent routine to maintain motivation, even after losses. He shares his experience of changing his approach after a string of losses, focusing on individual feedback and goal setting rather than dwelling on the defeat.
• Focus Through Success: The speaker highlights the importance of maintaining focus even after victories. He describes a post-game routine that includes individual feedback, reviewing team goals, and watching highlight tapes to reinforce positive aspects of the game.
• Shifting Perspective: The speaker emphasizes that the focus should be on becoming the best version of the team, rather than solely on defeating the opponent. He views the opposing team as a tool for improvement, helping the team reach its full potential.

The Value of Routine (7m26s)

• The speaker emphasizes the importance of routine in his coaching and personal life, highlighting its value in both positive and challenging situations.
• He describes his specific routine during practice, which includes a warm-up, individual work, a dynamic warm-up with personal interactions, and a team huddle to set goals and expectations.
• The speaker believes that routine provides a sense of predictability and structure, allowing individuals to focus on their goals and perform at their best, especially during stressful or uncertain times.

Positive Feedback and Praise (9m1s)

• Positive feedback and praise are essential components of effective coaching. The speaker emphasizes that "you get more bees with honey than vinegar," meaning that positive reinforcement is more effective than criticism.
• The speaker draws a parallel between coaching and learning to play the piano. He highlights the importance of having a good teacher who can guide and support the learner, enabling them to achieve a level they couldn't reach on their own. Similarly, coaches should aim to help players reach their full potential through guidance and support.
• Building trust and demonstrating care are crucial for effective coaching. The speaker emphasizes the importance of showing players that the coach cares about them and is there to support them, even when they make mistakes. This creates a strong bond and fosters a positive learning environment.

Taking Risks (10m46s)

• Taking risks is an important part of leadership and coaching. The speaker, a successful coach, emphasizes the value of taking risks, citing his own experiences of leaving a top-ranked team to coach at Stanford and then leaving Stanford to coach the Olympic team. He believes that these risks, while challenging, ultimately led to significant growth and success.
• Risk-taking can lead to both successes and failures. The speaker acknowledges that not all risks pay off, using the example of implementing a new offense over Christmas break, which initially resulted in a loss. However, he emphasizes the importance of learning from failures and adjusting strategies, as he did by refining the new offense and ultimately winning a national championship.
• It's crucial to take calculated risks. The speaker advises against taking reckless risks, emphasizing the importance of considering the potential consequences and ensuring that risks are well-thought-out and strategically planned. He highlights the importance of having a strong team and support system to help navigate the challenges that come with taking risks.

Dual Role of Coaching (12m56s)

• The coach believes that helping players become better on the court and in life are not separate goals, but rather intertwined.
• He emphasizes the importance of developing strong teammates, highlighting qualities like unselfishness, discipline, hard work, and encouragement.
• The coach believes that these qualities are essential for success both on and off the court, and that the greatest reward is being part of a successful team rather than individual achievements.

Handling Turnover and Onboarding (14m11s)

• Handling Turnover: The coach emphasizes the importance of celebrating departing players and their contributions at a year-end banquet. This signals the end of the current season and allows for a smooth transition to the next year.
• Onboarding New Players: The coach implements a structured onboarding process for new players, introducing them to "The Stanford Way," which encompasses team values, expectations, and routines. This process emphasizes communication and leadership, with senior players mentoring freshmen and fostering a culture of continuous improvement.
• Empowering Team Leadership: The coach believes in empowering senior players to mentor and coach younger players, creating a self-sustaining system of knowledge transfer and leadership development. This approach allows the coach to focus on broader strategic goals while fostering a strong team culture.

Managing Emotions (16m39s)

• The speaker, a coach, emphasizes the importance of managing emotions in order to stay calm and communicate effectively, both on and off the court.
• He believes that by slowing down the game mentally, rather than letting emotions speed it up, players can maintain composure and focus.
• The coach aims to control his own emotions and encourages his team to do the same, believing that emotional outbursts can hinder performance and lead to unnecessary penalties.

Handling Mistakes and Staying Positive (17m55s)

• The speaker emphasizes the importance of slowing down in stressful situations to avoid emotional reactions that can cloud judgment. They suggest taking a break, pausing a meeting, or simply taking a walk to regain composure.
• The speaker highlights the concept of "next play," which involves focusing on the present moment and moving forward from mistakes rather than dwelling on them. They acknowledge that the brain is naturally inclined towards negativity, but encourage a positive mindset and support system to help individuals overcome setbacks.
• The speaker emphasizes the importance of encouragement and positive reinforcement, especially in high-pressure situations. They advocate for a culture of support where mistakes are seen as learning opportunities and individuals are encouraged to keep playing and striving for success.

Equity in Sports (19m35s)

• The speaker believes that equity between women's and men's sports is a crucial issue and shares their personal experience of witnessing disparities in treatment between genders, even within their own family.
• The speaker highlights the unequal treatment of women's and men's basketball teams during the 2021 NCAA tournament, specifically citing the disparity in weight room facilities and the different testing protocols used for athletes.
• The speaker emphasizes the importance of having allies, including parents and other supporters, in advocating for fairness and equality for women in sports. They also share their strategy of prioritizing winning a national championship before addressing the issue publicly, believing that a championship victory would provide a stronger platform for raising awareness.

Final Three Questions (21m21s)

• The conversation begins with the interviewer congratulating the coach on having a basketball court named after him and asking for advice on how to accept praise gracefully. The coach acknowledges the honor and expresses his gratitude, but also admits to feeling embarrassed when singled out for success. He emphasizes that the accolades reflect the hard work of his team, family, and university, not just his own individual achievements.
• The interviewer then asks the coach to name a communicator he admires and explain why. The coach chooses Marian Anderson, a civil rights leader and singer, and Jerry Seinfeld, a comedian. He explains that both individuals evoked strong emotional responses in him through their performances, leaving a lasting impression.
• Finally, the interviewer asks the coach to identify the first three ingredients of a successful communication recipe. The coach emphasizes the importance of listening to understand the other person's perspective, delivering a valuable message, and ensuring clarity in communication. He believes that these three elements are crucial for effective communication, even for coaches who are often seen as speakers.

Conclusion (26m30s)

• The episode concludes with a call to action for listeners to learn more about creating a strong leadership presence by listening to previous episodes featuring Muriel Wilkins and Jeff Imlt.
• The episode credits the production team, including Jenny Luna, Ryan Campos, H Ash, and Matt Abrahams, and acknowledges the music by Floyd Wonder.
• The episode encourages listeners to subscribe, rate, and follow the podcast on various platforms, including YouTube, other podcast platforms, LinkedIn, and Instagram, and to visit faster smarter.iio for additional content.