Jordan Peterson - How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs (4K)
04 Dec 2023 (12 months ago)
Why We Need to Experience Difficulty (0s)
- Addressing challenges passionately is essential because avoiding life’s difficulties may lead to bitterness and negativity.
- Engendering an adventurous spirit by confronting life truthfully can transform fear into excitement.
- Manipulating words to avoid accountability or gain unfair advantage is ultimately detrimental.
- Speaking and living truthfully aligns one with the force of reality and leads to authenticity and adventure.
- Concealing one’s potential contributions out of fear leads to a destructive path of cynicism and jealousy.
Is Cynicism Helpful? (3m4s)
- Cynicism arises when naiveté—initial optimism without understanding malevolence—is shattered.
- Cynicism, despite being a step forward from naiveté, risks becoming a stagnant endpoint if not transcended.
- Replacing naiveté with courage can restore optimism as a moral imperative.
- Faith, misrepresented by skeptics as superstition, truly signifies the courage to persist and adapt regardless of life’s uncertainties.
- People should be skeptical of their own cynicism, questioning its moral validity and the convenience it provides for shirking responsibility.
- Instead of delusion, adopting a constructive fantasy or a positive strategic plan for the future is beneficial.
- A delusion is a belief disconnected from reality, whereas a plan is a map of potential future paths, not inherently deceptive.
The Inner Citadel (10m20s)
- The concept of the inner citadel refers to retreating into oneself when external fulfillment is blocked.
- Emotional retreat often leads to constructing fantasies that can lead to madness and delusions.
- After a plan fails, one can retreat and reconstruct their world in fantasies of revenge and desire.
- Alternatively, one can retreat inwards, reflecting on personal errors or insufficient actions that led to the failure.
- Acknowledging personal mistakes is painful but necessary for growth.
- Confessing one's shortcomings helps to identify and rectify errors, leading to self-improvement.
- Asking questions and revealing ignorance is a way to remedy it and improve understanding.
- Seeking the truth about one's failures, despite being hard, is not delusion but a path toward rectification and strength.
Balancing Happiness & High Standards (16m44s)
- Happiness is the difference between expectations and reality, with high standards often causing a sense of lack.
- To cope with high standards, one must balance their ideal and their view of their potential.
- It is important to reduce the gap between current state and ideal to a bearable level and then progress incrementally.
- Small, disciplined steps towards improvement can lead to exponential growth, mitigating feelings of inadequacy.
- The Matthew principle suggests that those improving will continue to do so at an increasing rate.
- Starting from the bottom and addressing weaknesses is necessary, although it can be embarrassing or painful.
- Actions such as going to the gym can boost physical confidence and coordination, reflecting the larger principle of growth through small steps.
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Who Are You Comparing Yourself To? (23m43s)
- People often select inappropriate comparison groups, including high performers and historical figures.
- Comparing oneself to public figures like Joe Rogan is considered unfair due to their extensive experience.
- Individuals who aim high but compare themselves with top performers can feel despondency and pride.
- The correct comparison group should be oneself in the past, allowing a personalized measure of improvement.
- Comparing yourself to a high achiever only reveals a curated slice of their life, not the full reality they experience.
- Peterson advises aiming towards lofty achievements while maintaining realistic self-assessment.
What It’s Like to Be Elon Musk (28m30s)
- Elon Musk described his mind as a storm, which can be a downside of high-level genius.
- Verbal fluency, associated with creativity, varies wildly between individuals.
- High creators like Musk live near the manic edge, constantly contending with a flood of thoughts.
- Musk's unique combination of creativity and conscientiousness allows him to focus and execute ideas effectively.
- Creativity and conscientiousness are rarely found in one individual, making Musk exceptionally rare.
- The price of being someone who achieves great things, like Musk, includes taking on their baggage and issues.
Has Fame Changed Jordan? (34m31s)
- Jordan Peterson observed misery at a larger scale when his fame increased.
- As a clinician, Peterson was accustomed to dealing with existential problems, but the scale of demoralization he encountered among young men, later also young women, after fame was surprising and brutal.
- Fame made him realize the profound impact of offering people an encouraging word and its necessity.
- He noticed a positive change in audiences over time, from ragged individuals to well-dressed and more diverse groups, often attending with partners.
- While his life seemed controversial from an online perspective, most of his experiences remained positive even when faced with regulatory college issues in Ontario, which he considers a nuisance.
Peterson's Career and Teaching Approach Before Fame
- Jordan Peterson enjoyed a positive teaching and research career at Harvard and the University of Toronto.
- His academic and clinical work was satisfying, and he maintained good relationships with students, peers, and friends.
- The content of his courses, which combined archetypal and religious ideas with neuroscience, was considered unorthodox.
- The field of psychology largely ignored Carl Jung and focused on materialist and behavioral perspectives. Peterson, however, actively studied and integrated these concepts into his work despite their unpopularity in academia.
- He believed in being true to one's vision and interests and found success by not compromising his identity, which led him to a fulfilling career at institutions that valued his approach.
- A long-lasting and impactful association with his graduate supervisor, Robert Peel, contributed positively to his career and personal development.
Why You Should Always Tell the Truth (47m43s)
- Douglas's boss, a known figure in publishing, had his West End play about Prince Charles fail disastrously.
- Douglas asked him why he chose to create the play in rhyming couplets; the boss explained he followed his instincts which can sometimes lead one wrong, but they're also the only thing that has led him right, emphasizing the importance of following one's instincts.
- Jordan Peterson links this to his advice on not lying because lies can corrupt your instincts, leading to a misinterpreted or false orientation.
- He warns that lying pathologizes instinct, causing intuition to be unreliable and ultimately leading you to problems and delusions of your own making.
- Peterson mentions the sin against the Holy Ghost from the gospels, interpreted as corrupting one's instinctual orientation, emphasizing the importance of truth.
- By warping your vision with lies, you cannot see the world clearly and will encounter unnecessary obstacles.
- He asserts that self-deceit, lying to oneself and others about one's nature, leads one off one's path, resulting in repeated failures and misconceptions about the world.
- Emphasizes fear of the consequences of falsehood is greater than fear of speaking and acting according to one's beliefs.
- Concludes with an example of Ron Jeremy, whose supposed success was in fact a personal hell because he was admired for reasons that did not align with a true or fulfilled life.
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How Pickup Artistry Created Incels (54m20s)
- Pickup artists offered a script for men to have more success with women but ultimately led to a more jaded worldview.
- Adhering to these strategies can create a gap between one's true self and the artificial persona they portray, worsening self-perception.
- The tactics taught mirror a form of "scripted psychopathy," where individuals feign confidence and emotional stability to seem more competent.
- These behaviors, if not genuinely integrated into one's personality, reward fakeness and encourage manipulation akin to psychopathy.
- Following such methods can lead to becoming more jaded especially when manipulating "reasonably good women."
Influence of Confident Personalities [Omitted Timestamp]
- Influential figures like Andrew Tate appeal to young men because they exude a form of false confidence.
- Tate is both criticized and admired for his physical bravery and lifestyle that's attractive to less successful men.
- While Tate's approach may not be ideal, he represents a form of progress from naivety to acknowledging one's dark potential.
- Engaging with negative influences like Tate can be a learning experience in confidence, but needs to be moderated with genuine character development.
Growing Through Rejection and Critique [Omitted Timestamp]
- Pickup artistry also promoted exercises, like asking numerous women for their number, to overcome fear of rejection and grow from the experiences.
- Intellectual humility is critical, and one should be open to asking questions and admitting ignorance.
- Confronting criticism, especially from enemies, can reveal personal flaws and foster growth.
- Facing attackers forces an individual to contend with potential issues and strengths within themselves.
- Journalists often set verbal traps in interviews, with some seeking to enhance their reputation at the interviewee's expense.
- Navigating such traps successfully can tilt public opinion in one's favor, as seen with Jordan Peterson's own interview experiences.
Reflecting on the New York Times Hit Piece (1h6m20s)
- Reflecting on a difficult period, which included a confrontational interview, evokes the memory of how ill health magnified the strain of such encounters.
- Conversations with critics like Sam Harris, despite being adversarial, are seen as beneficial, enabling scrutiny of one's ideas and promoting clarity.
- The concept of 'loving your enemy' is broached, highlighting the paradoxical benefit of using criticism as a formational tool, despite the critic's negative intentions.
- The negative press, even outrageous slanders, can be twisted into opportunities, as exemplified by Peterson's reflection on being misportrayed in a Captain America comic and a poorly received film involving Olivia Wild.
- A critic-turned-friend story is shared, demonstrating that engaging with critics can lead to surprising alliances and helps identify personal blind spots, resulting in significant growth.
- The importance of discomfort in facilitating self-examination is acknowledged, as personal challenges propelled the move from unrecognized weaknesses to enlightenment.
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Being Grateful For Suffering (1h13m38s)
- Jordan Peterson touches on personal experiences of bullying in school and how he turned negative experiences into positive self-qualities.
- He links the ability to be alone and work independently to experiences of not having a tight social network growing up.
- Peterson also discusses seeking validation, admitting it as a continuing effect of childhood experiences.
- He stresses the importance of practicing gratitude even in face of suffering, looking at the biblical story of Job as a moral story of maintaining faith despite adversity.
- Peterson elaborates that adding bitterness and resentment to suffering only intensifies the hellish aspects of one's life.
- He advises the moral necessity of aiming high and treating others well regardless of personal suffering.
The Paradox of Privilege and Complaints [Discussion Continuation]
- Peterson observes that those raised in privilege often complain more, whereas those from deprivation can sometimes show more gratitude.
- He provides insights into the corruption he witnessed in academia, pointing to the trend where individuals often compromise their own beliefs for security or advancement.
- Peterson explains that courage doesn't come from security because it inherently involves risks; actions based on securing a risk-free environment can compromise one's integrity.
- He concludes that material wealth does not inherently grant taste or virtue, just as poverty does not define the richness of character or design sensibility.
The Decline of Mental Health in Young Adults (1h23m23s)
- A Harvard study highlights increased anxiety among young adults aged 18 to 25.
- Loneliness was reported by 34%, pressure to achieve by 51%, and lack of meaning by 58%.
- There's a noticeable gap in understanding the well-being of these young adults compared with teens.
- Young adults exhibit roughly double the rates of anxiety and depression compared to teens.
- Transition to adulthood is now a more challenging phase than Peterson's generation.
- The modern therapeutic approach contributes to these difficulties due to an overemphasis on subjective mental health and identity.
- Actual mental health is linked to participation within a societal framework rather than individualistic thinking.
- Young adults are struggling with their identity and purpose due to a misconception that their individual desires define them.
The Importance of Long-term Relationships and Social Responsibility
- Peterson argues that stable long-term relationships, like marriage, are vital for fostering mental health and purpose.
- He suggests that voluntary adoption of societal responsibilities helps formulate identity, thus reducing anxiety.
- Engaging in short-term pleasures without responsibility leads to psychological troubles.
The Role of Social Hierarchies in Personal Development
- Collaboration with others in a social hierarchy plays a crucial role in an individual's development.
- Personal aims or goals should ideally benefit others and the larger society for long-term well-being.
- Identity encompassed within one's role or contribution to society grants a more secure and purpose-filled existence.
The Misconception of Identity Based on Sexuality
- The reduction of one's identity to sexual desire, particularly immediate gratification, is detrimental.
- Human beings require a high-investment strategy for reproduction, indicating that sexuality is inseparable from relationships and responsibility.
- Short-term sexual strategies often lead to characteristics associated with psychopathy and narcissism.
Consequences of Short-term Gratification Pursuits
- Indulging exclusively in short-term pleasures can lead to despair, anxiety, and hopelessness.
- Missteps in personal encounters during such pursuits can haunt individuals later in life.
- The social climate fostering instant gratification can also impact the well-being of potential partners, often manifesting in damaged relationships.
- The pursuit of immediate, low-value pleasures without considering long-term impacts can result in a sense of desperation and a lack of fulfillment.
Reacting to Forecasts of Population Decline (1h37m26s)
- U.S. Census Bureau predicts first-ever population decline in the U.S. by 2100, with a peak in 2080.
- Population expected to reach 370 million by 2080 and reduce to 366 million by 2100.
- Immigration is unable to offset the declining birth rates.
- Jordan Peterson remarks that things are still getting worse regarding birth and marriage rates.
- Elon Musk has warned of the dangers of policies leading to population decline, as things that don't grow typically die.
- Peterson discusses identity as not merely how one feels about themselves but also as a function of their relationships and responsibilities in the world.
- He elaborates that identity can be based on roles such as being a professor, husband, and father, emphasizing that these are not just mental constructs but patterns of relationship.
- Responsibility and engagement in these roles are more important for mental health than seeking glory for oneself.
- Having a child is mentioned as a crucial step in maturity and responsible citizenship, offering a sense of importance and fostering growth.
- Peterson introduces the subsidiary model of governance which advocates taking care of oneself and scaling social responsibilities.
- He criticizes the modern focus on individual hedonism and isolation from responsibilities.
- The concept of sanity is presented as a harmony between the individual and the external world, not just internal psychological structure.
Being Friends With Douglas Murray (1h44m55s)
- Douglas Murray is seen as highly disagreeable, combative, and enjoys intellectual confrontation.
- Peterson and Murray both value addressing problems immediately and thoroughly.
- Murray is admired for his relentless commitment to holding people accountable.
- The idea is raised that individuals become what they practice, turning any judgment they cast on others upon themselves.
- Murray's combativeness is balanced by his carefulness with words and his wit, making him a formidable figure in debates.
- During a tour with Peterson, Murray's skills in wittiness and factual argumentation enhanced the debate experience.
- The effectiveness of humor in public speaking and debates is emphasized; a few impactful jokes can win the crowd.
- A comparison is made between the expectations of comedians and intellectual public speakers in live performances.
Are Our Intellectuals Limited By the Culture War? (1h49m41s)
- Douglas noted smart people are absorbed in culture wars, debating issues like gender identity, distracting from other intellectual endeavors.
- Jordan Peterson has been collaborating with Daily Wire, who prefer to focus on deeper philosophical, theological, or dramatic topics instead of being mired in political debates.
- Daily Wire is expanding into entertainment for both children and adults, creating movies and TV shows.
- Ben Shapiro, notable for his political commentary, participated in a philosophical seminar with Peterson, suggesting a desire for discourse beyond politics.
- Political discourse is seen as necessary but not the pinnacle of intellectual discussion, as it is often transitory and can lack depth.
- There is a balance to be maintained between creating content that is both intellectually rich and appealing to a broad audience.
- The temptation to chase trends or the algorithm for clicks can lead to a shallow or reactive type of political content, often referred to as "audience capture."
- Politicians and public figures struggle with being authentic yet marketable, exemplified by Elvis and his manager's dynamic in the recent biopic.
- Peterson emphasizes the difficulty of accurately assessing and delivering what the market demands without compromising intellectual or creative integrity, suggesting it as a topic in his new book.
Jordan’s Wrestling With God (1h53m53s)
- Jordan Peterson discusses his upcoming book "We Who Wrestle with God," which delves into biblical texts and the notion that to wrestle with God is inherent to everyone due to moral decision-making.
- Peterson interprets "Israel" as "we who wrestle with God" implying that grappling with moral choices is engaging with God, who represents the spirit that guides correct moral decisions.
- He explores the concept of defining God, contrasting modern questions of belief in God with understanding what God signifies.
- Peterson offers the medieval definition of God as the "sum bonum" or essence of all that's good, arguing that acknowledgement of a higher good ultimately connects to a belief in God.
- The Bible is analyzed as a coherent narrative, despite its varied authorship over time, that investigates the nature of God and the human relationship with the good.
Enlightenment and Counter-Enlightenment (1h53m53s)
- Peterson suggests that we are at the beginning of the counter Enlightenment, questioning the Enlightenment view of humanity, and argues that empirical orientation is insufficient for navigating the complexities of life.
- He outlines the insufficiency of facts to guide us as there are too many, leading to chaos and a sense of meaninglessness, and suggests that we organize facts into a hierarchy of values.
- Stories and narrative abstractions, such as archetypes in the biblical corpus, are discussed as being more real or "hyperreal" compared to observable reality.
- He discusses sacrifice as an important pattern, describing it as the human understanding of oneself over time and the necessity to make immediate sacrifices for future benefit.
- Peterson posits that human striving has a covenantal nature with a built-in bargain, that the right sacrifices would lead to desirable outcomes, an idea deeper than a social contract and ingrained in the fabric of reality.
Celebrities With Unearned Moral Reputations (2h7m30s)
- "Unearned moral reputation" is likened to "false sacrifice" and "performative empathy."
- Public displays of virtue can be suspect and may mask true character or intentions.
- Critique aimed at the inconsistency between public personas of compassion and private actions, citing Lizzo and Ellen DeGeneres as examples.
- Emphasis on genuine sacrifice over empty gestures, referencing biblical stories such as Cain and Abel.
- Importance of making sacrifices and the dangers of prioritizing short-term emotional comfort over long-term thriving.
- Performative compassion is critiqued as toxic sentimentality, which could be harmful over time.
The Decision to Avoid Decisions (2h16m44s)
- Indecision is seen as a form of decision-making, often stemming from a desire to avoid discomfort.
- The avoidance of difficult choices is critiqued for ultimately leading to stress and reduced personal growth.
- Encouragement of confronting challenges head-on to enhance competence and bravery.
- Biblical references used to suggest that facing trials could lead to personal transcendence and one's becoming a "true Son of God."
- Choosing falsehood and avoidance is contrasted with the ideal of facing truth and difficulties.
- A good parental figure is described as someone willing to upset their children for their benefit, guiding them rather than enabling harmful behavior.
- Love and care may require challenging someone when they are acting destructively, despite potential pushback.
How to Know If You Should End a Relationship (2h22m17s)
- Jordan Peterson discusses a Reddit thread with five questions to help individuals decide if they should end a relationship.
- The questions prompt self-reflection on the current state of contentment, authenticity in the relationship, love for the partner's actual self versus potential, and whether one would want their future child to date someone like their partner.
- Peterson explores the concept that postponing an uncomfortable breakup decision could falsely seem virtuous but may resultantly hide the issue.
Addressing Negative Beliefs and Relationship Conflicts
- He proposes that continual minor conflicts are necessary for resolving differences rather than accepting a compromise.
- Peterson suggests aiming to find common solutions in a relationship by utilizing each partner's unique skills.
- Similar to disciplining children, one must address and correct annoying behaviors in oneself or one's partner for the betterment of the relationship.
- For relationships, he advises identifying and addressing recurring problems, suggesting openness to the possibility that the issue could reside with oneself or the partner.
- Peterson emphasizes identifying the best aspects of the relationship to make the entire relationship resemble those high points, which requires significant effort.
The Michelangelo Effect and Parental Discipline
- The Michelangelo effect describes the process of partners helping each other become their ideal versions by fostering growth and setting boundaries.
- True love encourages a partner's hidden potential and discourages anything that hinders it, akin to Michelangelo revealing David from a block of marble.
- He connects the effect to the concept of judgment and improvement in both religious texts and parenting, arguing that compassionate judgment is necessary to encourage the best in people, including children.
- Peterson provides an example with his granddaughter, teaching her boundaries for fun interaction, and emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries to prevent curses of misbehavior.
The Happiness of Pursuit (2h33m36s)
- Jordan Peterson discussed the concept of "dopamine not being about the pursuit of happiness, but rather the happiness of pursuit" with Robert Sapolsky.
- He highlighted the story of Morgan Housel, who, upon reaching his long-planned vacation destination, immediately thought of planning a return trip, exemplifying the concept that it's not about the destination but the journey.
- Peterson stated that while consummatory rewards like an orgasm bring a sequence to a halt, dopaminergic rewards are about the evidence of advancement towards a goal.
- To become optimally engaged, one must pursue valuable goals that are within reach; goals that are too far out of reach won't provide the incremental rewards that dopamine facilitates.
- Pursuing the "highest possible goal" provides the greatest advancement rewards because the goal itself is highly valuable. However, the goal must be attainable to allow for movement towards it.
- Peterson relates this pursuit to religious concepts, explaining that a relationship with God can embody the ultimate goal to provide direction, and should be fractionated into proximal decisions. This vision resembles a paradisiacal state that is perfect yet continuously improving.
- The problem with a static utopian vision, according to Peterson, citing Dostoevsky, is that humans would desire a lack of this absolute content if given nothing but consummatory rewards, hence the need for "optimal deprivation."
- An example of meaningful pursuit is found in the Biblical Abraham, who left comfort for adventure and established a pattern of living and sacrifice that, according to Peterson, creates the optimal environment for successive generations.
Where to Find Difficulty in a Comfortable World (2h40m40s)
- People in a comfortable world seek challenges like weightlifting, icy baths, and difficult reading material.
- Engaging with truth is the most optimal difficulty as it is unpredictable, akin to an adventure.
- According to Christ's teachings in The Sermon on the Mount, orienting oneself with the highest ideals and living in truth daily is the right path.
- Accomplishing challenges enhances a person's view of the world and skill set even if the initial goal isn't met; this is the treasure to store up, valued more than wealth.
Are Universities Dying? (2h50m7s)
- The university experience can be valuable beyond the formal education received.
- Universities might be salvageable if they hold to their educational mandate, but many have become corrupt.
- Education should be an apprenticeship where students form valuable relationships with professors.
- Peterson Academy: an attempt to offer an alternative with high-quality lectures, rigorous certification, and a focus on both education and social aspects.
- A university allows for socialization and the opportunity for students to reinvent themselves and make breaks with their past.
The Benefits of Monk Mode (2h55m38s)
- Monk mode is a concept involving a period of isolation for self-improvement.
- It includes introspection, meditation, dietary and physical fitness improvements.
- The practice is compared to the act of confession, where one confesses and acknowledges personal flaws.
- Addressing these insufficiencies is painful but allows for problem-solving and progress.
- It enables individuals to confront their past, like overcoming unpopularity through developing social skills.
Personal Growth and Roommate Dynamics [Not Time Stamped]
- Having roommates in university was mentioned as a transformative experience, providing opportunities for social learning.
- The discussion touched on mastering basic social skills, such as introducing oneself, as essential for making friends.
- It was suggested to practice these skills and teach children to become adept at social interactions like handshakes, eye contact, and tempo-matching.
What’s Wrong With Creating an Online Persona (3h0m10s)
- Individuals create online personas that feel more real than their actual selves, and attempt to live up to these personas.
- Crafting a false persona to gain approval can lead to internalizing those falsehoods and rewiring oneself, changing the way one perceives the world.
- Peterson warns against falsifying one's identity, mentioning the example of Pinocchio's temptations to lie and indulge in escapism, which represent broader moral lessons about authenticity and the dangers of deceit.
- The soul is viewed as a structure through which the world is revealed, and it's vital not to distort this with falsehoods.
Advice for Intellectual Vs Intuitive Individuals
- Deep thinkers often rationalize rather than using intuition, which may lead to overthinking instead of listening to one's inner voice or conscience.
- Peterson distinguishes between intellect and paying attention, suggesting that one should focus on what is not known rather than on thinking alone.
- Humility is crucial for personal growth, and entails recognizing and addressing one's ignorance.
- Being brave enough to ask "stupid questions" can not only enhance personal understanding but also benefit others who share similar uncertainties.
- Gaining knowledge through humility is not strictly an intellectual pursuit but also a spiritual one, leading to earned wisdom.
What’s Next For Jordan (3h11m19s)
- Jordan Peterson is finishing a book set to be published in November.
- He plans to go on tour starting in January, covering the United States, Africa, South America, and Southeast Asia.
- The new book is expected to be more challenging than his last two but less than his first book, "Maps of Meaning."
- He believes the book will fundamentally challenge atheistic views through a reconsideration of belief, especially the belief in good.
- The book also discusses the relationship between science and religious belief, arguing that scientific practice is rooted in religious axioms.
Advice for Life on the Road [Not specified in the text provided]
- Approach the stage with gratitude for the opportunity to be there and for the audience that has come to see you.
- Be grateful rather than overwhelmed by the privilege of touring.
- To manage the demands of touring, delegate tasks that others can do, focusing on arriving at venues prepared.
- Post-show relaxation involves watching "Trailer Park Boys."